


Take me in and Kick me out

by violetjosh



Category: Twenty One Pilots
Genre: Alcohol, Casual Sex, Cats, Established Relationship, Friends to Lovers, Getting Together, M/M, Masturbation, Multi, Polyamory, Recreational Drugs, artist, chinchilla, ftm trans character, slow burn?
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-07-23
Updated: 2018-08-11
Packaged: 2018-12-05 16:09:44
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 9
Words: 33,131
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11581530
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/violetjosh/pseuds/violetjosh
Summary: "My heart's big enough for the both of you.""If you'll have me."





	1. Chapter 1

He taps his fingers against the top of bar, it's a soft oak wood and a little worn. The wood is chipping slightly, it’s not easily visible but Josh is there often enough to realize it, to feel it when he’s rubbing his thumb against the edge of the counter, it could use a bit of refurnishing. Along with the chipping, the counter is covered in sharpie. Phone numbers, lyrics, you name it. And you’d think vandalizing the bar top would be discouraged, which it is, however, that doesn’t stop Josh from giving out a sharpie to the occasional customer.

Josh is there nearly every day of the week. Not because he wants to but because he can be. He needs money so he picks up as many shifts as he can and he doesn’t object to working overtime either. Plus, being a bartender is good, he’s good at it and he enjoys it, flirting with customers comes easy to him, he brings in most of his tips that way.

When he serves drinks, he always has the most genuine smile he can muster. And when his co-workers ask if he'll take their shifts he always says yes.

Tonight, Ashley was supposed to come in and unsurprisingly: She never did. There's always supposed to be more than one employee working and it’s definitely not regulation to only have him on shift regardless of how busy the bar is.

Josh always takes one for the team though, like tonight and every other night, Josh works his ass off and it shows when his check is just a little bit bigger than his co-workers. His boss likes him for it, he likes him a lot.

Josh ignores the fact that his touches seem to linger when he talks to him, maybe there’s a hand on his shoulder, touching his arm or maybe he insists on getting closer then Josh is comfortable with when they talk. He pretends that his boss doesn't want anything from him other than hard work and he pretends that his job is okay, because it is.

The bar is practically vacant tonight, has been for hours. Josh is playing with a line of five shot glasses. He pokes them with delicate fingers, free hand under his chin in boredom. He moves them, they shuffle and clink together.

There's gentle murmuring. There are twelve people in the bar with him. twelve customers. He'd counted them all already, then he'd played that game where you make up a life story for someone based off of their actions.He'd already served them all too, a few beers, a few vodkas and one scotch.

There's only one girl, she's sat alone, she's drinking her breakup away, Josh can tell. In fact, he's sure of this. She's solemn, her hair is a mess, her voice was wavering when she requested five shots of vodka and she had cried out the name Adam three times already. She was still crying, blonde hair getting in her eyes, makeup running down her cheeks. she looked tired, her eyes red and puffy.

He'd already checked up on her twice and cut her off from any more alcohol. She hadn't complained, she'd thanked him and Josh had patted her shoulder like he knew her.

She was more interesting than everyone else and she kept drawing his attention with her sobs and little sniffs.

The group of men watching sports on the one tv the bar had, they were louder, they were drinking beers. Josh ignores them. Mostly because he doesn't particularly like them, they've been here for an hour. Not very long, he assumes they'll come by an ask him for a few more beers within the next thirty minutes.

The door opens and there's someone new. It's no surprise. It's only nine, he assumes there will be a few more people that'll come in and that'll be it for the night.

Josh looks up, he stands up straight, adjusting his bad posture when the person comes in. He can't not check to see who it is. He’s bored and entertainment is sparse tonight.

The man is pretty, he looks soft. He’s definitely not a regular and Josh can’t recall a single time he’s seen him. His head is shaved, his cheeks are flushed and there's bright paint staining the arms of his jacket, starting right at the end of his sleeves. Josh thinks it's paint at least, he's not sure.

He knows that if he ever showed up to work like that he'd get in trouble.

Pretty boy as Josh has decided to call him stumbles forward, his jean jacket practically falls off of him, there's a hole in it on one side, obvious from the angle he’s standing at now.

His eyes scour, they meet Josh's, he smiles, he nods. Josh does the same but he doesn't look away when the man does.

The man, he scratches at the scruff on his face and then he searches, eyes squinting at the loud group of guys towards the left.

A look of disgust, a roll of his eyes. he turns, inquisitively and misses Josh's eyes.

Josh watches curiously, not too obviously.

He watches as the man’s eyes light up, he watches him glance at the crying girl and he watches him waltz over and sit across from her, arms folding over the table.

The chair scrapes the floor, Josh winces and he looks away. Staring is rude he decides. Josh doesn't stare, Josh is respectful and he's a bartender. He just makes their drinks, he keeps them hydrated with toxicity. The bearer of addiction.

His job isn't to invest into finding out about what his customers are doing with their lives, who they're doing and what their life stories are. Although he's had his fair share of all of those. It happens a lot, it's late, people are sad, they have things they want to say, they have things they need to vent out.

Josh is an open ear, Josh is stuck behind a bar and Josh is a really fucking nice guy.  
So he'll listen, he won't give much input but he'll be there and sometimes his heart will ache.

He keeps busy and wipes down the bar with a rag, he cleans up spilt vodka and he hears the crying stop and then he hears the men cheer loud. This isn't a sports bar. he's annoyed but really he can't tell them to shut up.

Josh is used to the tinge of chaos the bar holds, today's been a slow day though. it's Tuesday, no one comes to a bar like this on Tuesdays. There's no drunk hook up's in the bathrooms on Tuesdays, there's no yelling unless cheering counts and Josh can handle the entire bar by himself, he really likes Tuesdays for these reasons. There are a few regulars too, he recognizes them. He knows their drink orders by heart and he knows when they need a cab to bring them home.

Pretty boy is still sat with the girl. Josh notices this when he's wringing out the rag over the sink. Josh stares again, warm water squeezing between his fingers.

The man’s fingers are on her wrists now, he's soft and his touches linger. Josh is in disbelief, he lets out a quiet tuft with his tongue.

He watches as he laces his fingers with her's and brushes a strand of hair out of her eyes and he watches the girl blush hard and cover her cheeks with the back of her hand.

She rubs at one of her eyes, mascara smearing some more.

Josh blinks.

Pretty boy is talking to her, he's using the pads of his thumbs to wipe tears from her under her eyes.

She laughs, Josh can hear her. He stares, he watches. Maybe it's a little bit rude at this point. His fingers curl around the rag and he drops it into the sink, bobbing his head slightly.

He sighs and finds his phone, he shouldn't be watching so intensively. His fingers twist along the hem of his white button up. His phone is set beside a bottle of scotch he hadn't put away.

He changes the playlist, something smoother. Fingers tapping through spotify, he finds something titled 2017 sucks. He lets out a faint laugh and he clicks on it, music on the speakers instantly changing. it's slow, it doesn't make sense to play in this bar. Everything's fast here. Josh decides he likes it anyways and sets his phone back down, he turns up the volume a bit and music resonates from the large speakers spaced around, drilled to the walls.

Pretty boy glances over at him, tilts his head just slightly and Josh gulps and diverts his attention to his own hands.

He looks back up and the man’s attention is not on him anymore, he’s now leaning over the table, a hand on the blonde's shoulder, lips by her ear as she crosses her legs. The girl crosses her legs tightly and Josh can't help but wonder what the man is saying to her. She was just crying five minutes ago, she was a complete mess and now her face is beet red and she’s flustered.

Josh can tell.

They both get up, the man grabs her wrist gently, he tugs her forward, he laughs and pulls the girl closer, a hand around her waist. He looks back at Josh and he winks and then they're both gone out the door and Josh purses his lips and furrows his brows.

That was the fastest he'd ever seen a guy pick someone up. Fastest he'd seen anyone get another person in bed, completely sober. At least that’s what he can assume so far, it makes the most sense at the moment so he just marks it off as a hook up.

Josh probably should've stopped him he decides. The poor blonde was vulnerable and the poor blonde just got swooped away and charmed to do god knows what. Josh can only imagine what they'll be doing, he feels only slightly guilty for thinking it.

He feels stupid that maybe he's a little bit jealous.

A group of people walk in, already laughing. Already giggling and Josh sighs and gets back to work.

*

Josh walks home in the dark, thick sweater hanging loose of his torso. he counts his steps, then his breaths and he doesn't think about how much he hates the night. It’s too cold and it makes him anxious to be walking through the city even if it just to the bus station. He’s out late enough that he has the right to be nervous, it’s 1AM.

His cats greet him when he gets home, Oscar meows and Bear struts past him and rubs against his leg.

There's one light one, It's the lamp in the living room he hadn’t bothered turning off. It's standing beside the couch and that's the only thing allowing him to see his cats properly.

He sighs and shuts it off and he toes off his shoes as he walks around his small apartment. A sense of safety in the air.

He fills Oscars food dish, then Bear's and he sets them on opposite sides of the kitchen floor to keep his cats civil.

They meow contently and Josh sighs again, he pulls off his sweater and begins loosening the buttons of his dress shirt that he'd hidden underneath as he shuffles to his bedroom.

Pretty boy is on his mind when gets into bed. when he pulls the sheets over himself.

He thinks about his hands, his eyes, his body, the way he touched that girl. He made her go red. He probably brought her home and……..yeah he really shouldn’t be thinking about this. He’s normally not in the habit of fantasizing about strangers.

But he is, he’s fantasizing about him, having sex with him, he really should be.

Josh wants to.

Josh wonder's how he is in bed.

Josh comes with a groan and a hand down his briefs.

He's not embarrassed.

*  
  
Josh is busy, he's rounding up drinks for a group of smiling girls. He's smiling at them too, they're trying to flirt with him. They bat their eyelashes, they touch him when he passes them their drinks. They try.

He's dismissive of them though, not interested in the slightest, he waves them off and as he walks around the back of the bar to grab a bottle of tequila. Carefully twirling a loose strand of red hair around his finger and whistling something under his breath.

It's busy this time, It's loud. The atmosphere is tiring and it's Friday. The bar stools are all occupied except for one and there's nowhere else to sit. All the booths are full, all the couches are too. Josh would say the bar was completely full except Friday nights are nothing compared to Saturday nights.

Saturday nights are when he gets home at 3 am because people refuse to leave. Saturday nights are when he falls asleep the moment he hits the bed and he curls up into his blanket, still in his work clothes. Everyone's a lot more rough, more careless on Saturday's.There's three people working the bar, and his boss is usually there to keep an eye on things because really it's needed.

He refills cups, he keeps tabs on a few people, he smiles and smiles and smiles because Josh is charming. Josh is good at his job and he knows that by being nice is how he's going to get tips, that's how he's gonna get people telling him to "keep the change."

Money rolls in, he keeps conversations going. People spin on the bar stools, he laughs and he rolls his sleeves up exposing his tattoos when he starts sweating a bit too much.

He receives compliments too, a guy with blue eyes tells him he looks hot. He nods and tells him he's cute because he is.

They talk a bit, but Josh doesn't think blue eyes is willing to wait for him to get off his shift so he gives him a beer on the house as an apology.

He sees him leave the bar twenty minutes later, an arm around a short boy.

People come and go, Josh is constantly moving. He handles the simpler stuff, Ashley who had decided to show up for work for once is making cocktails. The ones Josh is too lazy to learn how to do. He tells everyone he'd suck at them anyways, so no one tries to force him to learn.

The music isn't loud enough anymore, everyone talks over it. Josh wonders what types of conversations are being held. Although he works at a bar, spends almost all of his time at a bar. Rarely taking a day off even though he only needs to work 4 times a week.

he barely goes out to bars with friends. it's ironic in his opinion.

He's pouring shots of tequila when another gorgeous man walks in. Josh's eyes lock on the door and follow him as he strides to the left, he blinks and what the fuck, where are they all coming from.

His palms go flat on the countertop, no piercing voices screaming for alcohol are heard.

He's got glasses, thick rimmed, it's almost endearing and Josh catches the way the man pushes them up the bridge of his nose. Dark hair, raven dark, and Josh pinches his wrist and stops staring. He scolds himself, he's rude for staring. He tells himself he'll make people uncomfortable.

He doesn't want that, so he tops off some girl's glass. She's hanging off the bar, boobs pushed up high and josh smiles at her. She sets down a twenty dollar bill.

He smiles again, grabs it and she shrugs.

Josh trips over his own feet and things get busy again. his shoelaces untie, he ignores them and ignores how annoying it is to walk around with one of his shoes practically falling off of his foot.

He tops off another three glasses and things calm down. Ashley's taking over now, she's stopped making cocktails, she's greeting customers quickly with perky chatter.

Josh takes a glance at the tv, men surround it. It's typical, and it's just a rerun from last night game. No one seems to notice.

His eyes meet the strangers and it's déjà vu, reminds him of pretty boy.

This guy is taller, not at all like the other man. His shoulders are a bit broader and his posture isn't great, he's just slightly slumped over. Josh looks at him quickly, he keeps looking back at him, searching his eyes, they don't meet his so his gaze drops to his torso and Josh squints his eyes just in the slightest and chews on his lip.

He's wearing a jean jacket with a hole in it.

It's more of a tear now that he sees it. Josh is leaning against the bar to get a better look, the guy is already talking to someone. The tear is right by the armpit and unmistakably it's the same jacket the man he'd seen only four days ago had been wearing. Albeit a bit tighter on this guy, it had been loose on the brunet but it's the same one.

He remembers it well.

Josh gets back to work, mind shifting. it's weird he thinks. Maybe it's not the same jacket. What if he'd stolen it from pretty boy? now that was a question.

He wasn't going to impose anything.

Painfully Josh drags his attention back to work, he longs to get another glance at this new guy. His clean cut hair, sharp jawline and his jacket. He wanted to see it again.

A man with a scruff beard grabs his attention, he taps his credit card against the counter.

"Champagne." He says. he's smug. Josh wonders why he's at such a crap bar but he smiles politely, a fake grin.

Josh shakes his head yes and pulls on his sleeves and he's pacing the back of the bar eyes searching the shelves because apparently champagne is now a thing he's required to take out for the night. he pops it open quickly, passing Ashley, eyes scanning bar stools as he pours the man a glass of champagne.

He sees the new stranger again as he places the glass of champagne down and he can't believe his eyes. He hadn't looked away very long, Josh is sure of it.

He's got two guys hanging onto him, tugging on his sleeve, kissing his neck and Josh hadn't even realized they were in there. He hadn't seen them before.

Josh is jealous. he wants to get laid. he wants, he wants, he wants.

His fingers aren't enough.

And he's sure, he's positive that beautiful stranger number two hadn't even gotten a drink from the bar. He hadn't ever came close enough, He was by the couches when Josh was trying his best not to be creepy. he was by the couches the entire time with an empty hand.

Josh is dumbfounded, he blinks a few times and stares down at his hands. He traces his fingers together and then he lets go and his palms go flat on the cold counter top again.

Two guys, same jacket, both pick up strangers to fuck and they both succeed.

Josh assumes so anyways, that's all he can really do.

He watches them start to leave curiously, there's three of them and he just, just catches this new strangers eye again as he starts for the door and looks at the bar one last time right before he walks out.

It's a quick stare down, Josh's mouth draws open.

The stranger smirks and Josh doesn't know what it means.

  
All three of them leave together.

  
Josh wants that too.


	2. Chapter 2

Josh gets laid.

Josh gets fucked against a wall in a bathroom. Leg propped up, toes curling, teeth biting his wrist. Joshhas no control, he hates but he tolerates it. He tolerates not being in charge, he tolerates that there's no condom involved. He should've asked for one. Should've asked for one, he always does but this time he doesn't and he can feel everything. He feels full.

His eyes are shut tight, arms around this strangers shoulders, legs tight around his hips and Josh gets fucked. He doesn't know his name, he saw him first. He poured him two shots of raspberry vodka, he winked, he charmed and at the end of his shift, he got pulled into the bathroom.

The bathroom of his own work place, the bathroom he constantly kicks adults out of because they're trying to fuck in the stalls. They're trying to fuck anywhere because bathrooms are convenient. Josh always tells them to leave, he kicks them out and says he's not impressed and then he tells them that bathrooms aren't a place for sex.

Josh is hypocritical. Josh has had sex in the stalls, against the door, gripping the sinks. Josh has fucked people too, Josh has picked people up after a shift and brought them in the bathrooms because it felt safer than bringing them home.

His boss questioned him about it once, he pulled him aside and asked if he'd been fucking around with customers. Josh said no, he said he wouldn't jeopardize his job like that. His boss patted his head and called him a good boy. Josh felt sick.

He whimpers and groans and he trembles and the man fucks him good and hard against the wall. Josh doesn't beg, Josh is quiet but he's loud and this man's dick is much too big to be inside of him. His shirt rides up, his back rubs against the wall, it burns just a little bit.

Josh's fingers drag down his back, he’s panting, breathless, he doesn't cry. He's good, the man tells him he's so good. Josh doesn't know him.

He thinks about boys, two boys. The same jacket. Josh isn't sure and he thinks about both of them as he grips the stranger tighter, stronger. He needs to be closer.

Josh comes first, the stranger right after.

He doesn't feel satisfied.

*

Josh watches pretty boy for the second time that week. He's primal, his eyes searching the bar. He leans his weight against a wall, his arms crossed, his lips pursed. The bar is much fuller than last time he'd seen him, Josh is much busier this time but still he's intrigued enough to stop what he's doing to stare.

He's wearing that jean jacket again, somehow it looks worse than last time. There's a new hole, a new tear right by one of its pockets and Josh wonders if it's actually the same jacket the other man had worn. It looks bigger too, like the boy had shrunk down a size or the jacket had went up one.

Somehow the man looks better though. somehow his eyes are darker and his walk is more confident and he's already shuffling over to the far end of the bar. And he's smirking and Josh notices there's a new streak of paint on the arm of the jacket. Red.

It's bright red, it's messy and Josh decides that it suits the jacket.

He still feels rude for staring so he looks away.

He minds his business. He tries to.

Josh gets back to work. Bartender charm turning on in seconds.

Josh pours twelve drinks, he pours them with knowing fingers and he's careful to not let a drop slip onto the counter. He wipes his hands on a rag, it's dry there's no alcohol on it. He throws it into the sink, he wets it and he leaves it in there and he picks up a new clean white hand towel and throws it over his shoulder.

He pours seven drinks and he's biting at his lip the whole time. He pulls at the same spot over and over, he counts each tinge. He draws blood and he pours four more drinks.

The bar is loud, there's talking and then it's quiet for a few seconds before conversation rises again and then it's quiet and people leave and new people replace them. Louder people, routier people, and Josh bites his lip some more.

He sets down a glass of water, extra ice. the girl wants to stay sober. she's a designated driver, her friends are drunk, she doesn't want to be. She reminds him of the blonde girl, the crying one but she's not blonde and her eyes are brown and not blue. She reminds him of her. She taps her fingers against the bar and he watches her pull out a sharpie and start writing on the wood. Her handwriting is quick, it's clean and Josh stares as she prints "You're all fucked." on the bar, right next to a phone number. It's upside down but he can still read it.

"Have a good night." He says, he smiles and he scratches his nails on his scruff.

He taps his finger nervously, grips the bar edge. Josh is distracted, he's always distracted when pretty boy is in his bar.

He sees the guy from last night too, the one from the bathroom and he's with pretty boy. Josh is jealous? Josh is curious, that's a better word. He couldn't be jealous.

Pretty boy is touching his shoulder, he's suggestive. Josh can tell, Josh can see it from all the way across the bar. Does he not have standards? it's not like the man from the bathroom was unattractive. He was sleazy though. Too touchy for Josh's liking, a bit too cocky and maybe he was a bit drunk. Josh knows he's about to walk out the bar door with a lanky guyin a worn jean jacket.

He watches it happen, eyes narrowed, still biting his lip. The brunet is fluttering his lashes, he looks at him though just like he did last time. It's nothing shy, it's subtle though. He turns his head just slightly to look back at Josh, fingers curling into the new strangers coat and he doesn't wink but he raises an eyebrow and then he's off, dragging a new person with him.

He groans, he sighs and he gets called over all the way to the opposite side of the bar. "6 shots of vodka please."

*

The shower runs over the radio silence of his apartment. It's always quiet. He's not a fan of silence, it's too much, it's not enough and he hates it.

Josh brings his knees to his chest and he sits in the tub, pressured water spitting at him. He soaks and he watches red dye swirl down the drain and splash the water. He rests his head against the back of the tub, dye leaking all over.

The residue, it's just residue from when he'd dyed his hair. It's still not at all gone. every shower his hair fades and josh watches it happen. He stares at the red mixed in with the water and he pays attention to it. The water's too  
hot, it burns just a bit, his skin is just slightly irritated.

Still wet he gets dressed, he pulls on sweatpants. They're uncomfortable, they stick to his skin, everything is uncomfortable.

He takes them off and opts for boxer briefs and a big maroon sweater that reaches his thighs. he shuffles around his apartment and finds Bear. Oscar's somewhere else. probably underneath the bed he figures. Oscar's more independent than Bear.

Bear is tiny, he's a pale dusty brown and he's got a black spot right over his right eyes. Josh loves him. He sets him on his lap, scratches behind his ear a few times and he hums as the cat curls and purrs against him.

He stretches in his lap and Josh holds him as he bares his tiny claws into his thighs. Josh flinches but keeps petting bear.

The tv is on, it's on low volume and it's still too loud. He scratches at the couch as he searches for the remote, other hand still petting his cat. his fingers wrap around the plastic and he tugs it over and turns it down more.

Ashley texts him to fill in for her at work, she says she's sick. Josh knows she's lying and for once, he really does not want to go to work. He doesn't reply.

Boredom sets in and Josh's mind is elsewhere and he's thinking of those two boys. He wants their names, he wants them to come to him in the bar and order something just so he can talk to them, both of them. Then he's thinking of threesomes and then he's reaching for his phone.

Josh is quiet and curious as he types in pornhub, slick fingers tapping his phone screen. He's curious as to how they work. He understands the basics. everyone gets fucked, it's nice, it seems simple but how do they divide who does what. is it natural, does it just happen or is someone ordering who does what. Josh is curious, he wants to know, Josh wants to know.

So he goes on Pornhub, he sets Bear aside. The cat trots away and perches himself on the arm of the couch, licks his paws and Josh moves onto the opposite end of the couch, pulling an embroidered couch pillow into his lap.

Josh plugs in earbuds for the sake of his pets and he fumbles with his thumbs and types in threesomes, not really knowing what he's looking for. it's innocent enough, he just wants to know.

The first one is three girls, he clicks on it, it loads for 4 seconds there's an ad that pops up and he turns up the brightness of his phone and taps continue to video. It's not an amateur video, it's professional. He turns his phone to the side and sets it on his knees and he leans just a bit.

he's not a huge fan but he watches the horrible acting and he sighs at the awful editing because one moment they're all talking and the next there's a blonde on her back, brunette between her legs and another blonde sitting on her face. The girls are loud and gentle and Josh watches the video for two minutes before he loses interest.

He goes to suggestions and scrolls, scrolls, scrolls until one of the cover pictures catches his eyes. He chooses a video, a new video with three guys.

This interests him, guys interest him more. They're grunting, there's what Josh would consider a twink taking a big cock up his ass and another one in his mouth and Josh gets the idea. As long as everyone gets off, it's good. He guesses it's important to not let anyone feel left out, porn is acting so of course everyone's included but Josh wants to know where he'd fit in.

He tilts his phone screen, getting rid of the glare from the lamp beside him while the man on screen deepthroats another man. The scene cuts, the moaning gets louder and Josh watches them cum all over each other.

He spends twenty minutes watching porn, just slightly aroused the whole time.

Positions switching out with every video. Variety.

He starts touching himself after the first 15 and after he comes he wipes his fingers off, cleans up the couch. A towel would've been good he decides and then he goes again, three more times.

*

Josh doesn't like running on trails. The one's beside forests, those ones with clean pavement and bikes everywhere. He despises them.

He doesn't really like exercising period. He does a lot of things he doesn't like though and although he doesn't like these things he tries to find away to hate them a little less. Make them more tolerable. Josh does this a lot, Josh is optimistic he tries to make the best out of every situation. He's a problem solver, that's what he tells himself.

So instead of running down a bike path, where there's the very real possibility of getting hit by a bike, or attacked by a squirrel. He's got a lot of irrational fears yet he declares this one as rational because he's sure they all hate him.

Josh is jogging down the streets of columbus before he goes in for work.

It's 12PM, it's warm out. Just warm enough to be jogging. It's fall, Josh says it is. Although really it's just the end of September and he's just a little too excited for halloween .

He's got loose shorts on and a looser shirt. His running shoes are old, they hurt his feet just a bit and when they untie themselves, due to his constant stepping on his shoe laces Josh doesn't bother to stop running and he's breathing hard.

His pace is good, his forehead is beading with sweat and he forgot a water bottle. He lets out a breath, its shallow and he turns a corner. He turns a few corners and then he's downtown.

There's people, they look at him. They look at his red hair, adults scoff because apparently having unnatural red hair is a crime in Columbus, Ohio. He likes his hair, it's a bit dead. He needs to save it, probably should stop dyeing it but he knows he'll dye it five more times before he buys an 'intensive care treatment' shampoo because that'll save his hair. It should.

He passes an apartment building, it's like his own. Just a bit nicer he decides. It's tall, he can't count all the floors from this close up. He's too close, he's running right beside it and his gaze is looking up just to see if he can count the balconies. He can't.

Josh pays attention to where he's going after that, distractions are everywhere though. He doesn't run into anyone, he's careful and he's mindful and Josh pays attention, good attention. Attention to the people rushing past him, attention to the couple that's making out against the side of a building, attention to the honking cars and attention to all the people that look at him when he passes by.

He knows none of them but they stare at him, it's weird. He's running and they're walking, there's not much of a difference.

He slows down, he starts walking just like everyone else when his knees start to hurt. It's just a small ache, he's always had bad knees. He has pain medication for them and joint reliever but he doesn't use either, he seems them as more of an option and less of a necessity.

There are paintings lined up against a brick wall, leaning, sitting, stacked and Josh is curious. He slows down just a bit as he walks by, almost to a full spot. The art immediately draws him in and it’s not surprising considering its content.

It's nude art, a bit more explicit and there's a lot of it. Josh can't look away, he comes full stop and picks at his jaw and he stares. People walk by, no one else stops. Josh shivers and he leans against a bike rack, fingers curling around the metal. He squints. It's all very open, there's detail, it's sexual, the canvases aren't huge and there are more dick's and vaginas painted than he's willing to count.

There's no one sitting by them, they're just there tilted against a ratty apartment building built with grey bricks and there's a black backpack beside a painting of a person with their legs spread wide open.

Josh wonders who'd buy these and where'd they'd put them. On their walls? It's too explicit, Josh could see this painter getting kicked off the streets for indecency and displaying it. Although it's just the human body Josh knows how people are. It's basically pornography.

He takes a breath and he leans down, he ties his shoes, resting his shoulder against the bike rack. He ties his laces and he sees bare feet in front of him. Toe nails painted blue, cut off jeans ending right before their ankles.

"Oh, it's you."

Josh looks up, squints his eyes. He recognizes him, how couldn't he. There's a pause, his eyes widen, the man in front of him does this thing where he shakes his head and lets out a faint laugh and Josh is bewildered. Last person Josh was expecting to see, Josh wasn't expecting to see him for at least a few days.

"Are these yours?" Is the first thing he asks, too stunned to ask anything else. Pretty boy tilts his head and looks back at the collection of paintings.

"All fifteen of them." He says, arms crossed over his bare chest. He's wearing his jacket again and he smiles a small smile.

"Uh- they're nice." Josh gets up clumsily, grasping onto the bike rack, using it as a crutch.

"Maybe." Pretty boy says, he shrugs. he's not wearing shoes or a shirt. Josh doesn't stare, he doesn't have to, they're talking, he can just make normal eye contact and hope this boy hadn't seen him staring at the bar those two times.

"Do these- do they take you long to do?"

"Depends on how good I am to them."  
His fingers twirl a piece of hair. "My models they're never good at keeping still." He says, he winks and licks his lips then he sighs and Josh breathes out.

“oh.” Josh stares at the paintings again, less subtle than last time and he can see the artist watching him in interest. He stares at them, then turns his head to look at one of the bigger pieces. It's a girl, bent over, hand gripping her ass. Nothing PG about it.

Pretty boy breaks Josh's silence and he changes subject quickly, moving away from Josh, hot pavement burning his feet, his hand waving at Josh to come follow him. Josh doesn't move.

"So, no work today?" He asks, his back is turned to Josh. The back of his jacket is distressed, there's more holes and Josh, he stares at them while the man rearranges his paintings. He can see his skin through the holes.

"In an hour."

"And you're just." He searches for a word, glancing back at Josh. "Roaming?" He raises a brow.

"Was running, my knees started hurting. I took a break."

"To admire my work." He suggests. Two women speed walk by them. It's annoying, they're sweaty and they both have grey hair and Josh can't help but notice the way they look disgusted when they see the paintings. The brunet watches too and he smiles and waves and he looks cute.

"Guess so." Josh returns to Pretty boy and nods, he leans against the bike rack.

"Flattered. I really am." He pulls out a cigarette from his pockets and sets it between his lips. He fumbles with the black backpack, he digs inside of it and he sighs and comes up empty handed. He sets the bag beside another one of his paintings, its of a dick. There's semen, it's obvious and Josh blushes, ducks his head down.

Pretty boy follows his gaze, he pokes at the canvas and bites at the inside of his cheek and glances back at Josh.

"This is allowed?" He gestures to his work.

"Probably not, but I have a permit." He shrugs, nearly cutting Josh off. He flicks ash off his cigarette, it flies down onto the pavement, his gaze follows it. "When I applied for one, these are not the paintings I said i'd be selling."

"You're not scared of getting in trouble?"

"No." He shakes his head and shuts his eyes and he takes another drag, blowing the smoke away from Josh. His head leans back against the wall. They both fall into silence as Josh just watches Pretty boy as he smokes and when his eyes open Josh is awkward.

"Well i-"

"Really should be going." He finishes for him, tilts his head against the wall and he wraps his arms around his legs. Hair sticking to the bricks. He looks at Josh. It's not meant to be rude.

"Y-yeah, that's it." Josh says but he doesn't move.

"Are you coming to the bar tonight?" He asks, fingers toying with the hair at the nape of his neck. He wants a name, he needs a stupid name but he can't bring himself to ask for one. He pulls on a strand.

"Eh, no not tonight, it's not my turn."

Josh furrows his brows, he doesn't question it. He nods and shrugs his hands into his pockets, curling his fingers into the material.

"Can i have your name?"

"I don't know." Tyler sighs. He takes another drag. "Can you?"

Josh doesn't say anything, he's embarrassed. He adjusts his shirt and ruffles his hair.

“I’m Tyler.” Tyler grins at him though and sticks his hand out."And you are?"

"Josh." They shake hands. 

"Nice to meet you." Tyler whispers under his breath. 


	3. Chapter 3

True to his word Tyler isn't at the bar that night.

Josh sighs and he watches another boy, the one with thick rimmed glasses instead. He's there when Tyler's not, he's there and he picks people up just as fast. Josh can't tell what does it, Josh wonders what he says to the strangers to get them into bed. 

Josh watches him leave, they share eye contact again. 

___

Rain splints against the windows of his apartment. He's only got three of them and the rain is so loud, it doesn't even feel like the morning anymore. The sky is unbelievably dark and Josh is curled up on his couch with Oscar and Bear snuggled against him. He picks at the threads of his knit blanket, rough under his finger nails. Thunder roars and both his cat's meow, Josh shakes his head and pulls them in.

He's tired, his under eyes are tinted purple and his skin is stupidly pale. His body is sore as he nudges his feet underneath him in comfort. His cats move with him, they're affectionate and just as scared of storms as Josh is. They don't like the noise or the darkness of the living room, the tv is on but the volume is muted and the sound of thunder protrudes over everything. Josh flinches each time there's noise outside, he sighs and he pets his cats in comfort. They've always been a safety blanket for Josh.

His curtains black out the room completely, he'd boughten them because watching movies during daylight sucked when there was a glare from outside. So he'd went out and boughten them. He was glad to have them now, no light leaked through even during the storm although Josh could hear water dripping through the cracks of the cills. He stares as it drops onto his floor beside his cat's scratch posts.

A wet spot forms on his floor. He's not in the mood to move, he doesn't want to go anywhere and his battered leather couch is comfortable, he sinks into it, it's cushiony and just slightly hard to get up from. His cats like it though, Oscar always sleeps behind it or underneath it. He's just slightly smaller than Bear and Josh lets him be most of the time.

Thunder strikes again, Josh sighs, his head hits the back of the couch and he's uncomfortable with the sounds coming from outside his window. It's too loud and both of his cats are scared and curling against his torso for warmth and protection. 

Josh pulls on a hoodie and loose sweatpants and he sniffles a little as he sees lighting strike. He hates storms. 

His neighbours awake, he knows this. He scrambles out of his apartment, large blue slippers on his feet they make scratchy noises against the carpet as he crosses the hallway. 

He knocks and shivers and he folds his arms. He hears shuffling on the other side of the door and then it swings open, Jon is in his pyjama's. He rubs at his eyes tiredly and yawns before noticing Josh. 

"Woah Josh, you okay man?" Jon asks, he's  concerned. His boston terrier runs up to Josh from the open door and circles his feet, He crouches down to pet her. Oreo, a name Josh had always laughed at lays on her back, pleading for belly rubs. 

"C-can I just hang out here for a bit? The storms is freaking me the fuck out." He says quietly, his tone soft. 

"Course man, i'll make you some tea." Jon says, whistling for Oreo to follow him inside. Josh follows, closing the door behind him. 

"Is chai okay?" He's walking into the kitchen, its visible from the front door. Oreo stays with Josh as he trudges around slowly. 

"Yeah. Thank you." He says. 

"No problem, get on the couch. I'll be right over." 

Josh nods and shuffles over to Jon's old couch, it's grey and there's barely any light in his apartment. Closed curtains, blackout ones because just as Josh, Jon isn't in the mood to have his eyes blinded or see lighting.  Jon's appartement is a replica of Josh's, their living rooms both set up the exact same and Josh finds comfort in this as he curls up in the corner of Jon's couch and Oreo sits in his lap. 

His mind is swarmed, he can still hear the storm. It's loud and he brings the dog closer as Jon waltz in and places a mug down on his coffee table. Josh trembles and Jon goes over to his record player and reads Josh's mind as he slips on a vinyl. 

"Thanks." 

"Storms are scary." Jon says, he sits down beside him and pushes the TV remote aside "I get it." 

He gets it, Josh is glad. Storms are terrifying. 

Jon gets it. He's a good friend. 

____

It's wet when Josh walks to work. The storm had subsided but he still dresses in layers, leggings, long sweater, coat and in a separate bag he carries his cleaned work clothes with him. It chafes against his thigh. 

His shoes get soaked. 

He passes by the corner he'd seen Tyler on last. The bricks are stained wet and the paintings are gone. Josh can't help but stare for a few seconds before he starts walking again. 

His fingers curl and he pulls his beanie down further on his head to cover his hair. 

It starts raining again. 

___

 

At work, Josh is in a bad mood. It's 9 PM the bar is full and he hates it. He hates how loud everything is and how he can still hear lightning and thunder from inside the bar. The windows tint with rain, these ones are tiny and people block them. He wants to be drunk like everybody else, he wants boys buying him drinks from accros the bar, he's not in the mood to work right now. 

Josh is going to the backroom to grab more vodka because they're out again. 

He's not actually getting vodka, he lies. 

He tells Ashley to hold the bar. She rolls her eyes, wipes her hands off on her apron and waves him off. Smoke break, he tells himself he deserves it. He'll get the vodka when gets back inside, it's a white lie. 

He shuffles to the back of the bar into the storage room and finds his hoodie, its old and he's had it for years. He slips it on, material much looser than his button up and he fumbles his fingers around the pockets until they wrap around a pack of smokes.

Josh sneaks out the back door and trudges into the alleyway beside the bar. It's musky, there's a rusty green garbage bin, Josh likes it. He huffs and he can hear whatever's left from the storm patting against the pavement. It's still raining, he pulls up his hoodie. 

He takes a deep sigh and pulls out his lighter, then takes out a cigarette and he sets it in his lips. He bites down just a bit, there's only one light in the alley right above the door and it's just bright enough so he can see what he's doing. 

"Hey." A voice says. Josh hadn't heard anyone coming. 

Josh drops his cigarette and looks up. He recognizes him, big glasses, Josh flinches , he's not wearing Tyler's jacket though. This time he's in a suit. 

"I'm Brendon." He introduces himself, Brendon introduces himself. He's not smiling, his suit is wet and he leans, leans, leans over beside Josh and rests himself against the bricks. Josh thinks he's weird. 

"Josh." He mumbles, he's cautious. It's admirable. 

"You follow me out here?" He glances at Brendon and flicks at his lighter until his new cigarette is flamed. Brendon's shadowed just a bit and Brendon smiles, he shakes his head, one of his fingers is adjusting his glasses. 

"It's plausible." He says, he scratches behind his ear and Josh watches. His attention is drawn and then he feels rain on his scalp, burning. He hates storms. 

Josh nods, he raises an eyebrow and takes a long drag, blowing the smoke towards the trash can. "And how'd you know i'd be out here?" He's curious. 

"Lets just call it" Brendon pauses, he smiles and Josh doesn't understand why. "instincts." 

"If that's what you want to call it." Josh says. 

There's more rain, it starts again. Josh shivers. He flicks the ash, his hand cups his cigarette and Brendon watches him. His eyes mischievous and big, his glasses seem to make no change to his facial expressions. Josh isn't sure how he feels. Rain patters just a bit more, the music inside gets louder and Ashley probably needs help now. Josh talks instead. 

"You drunk?" He asks and Brendon turns to look at him, eyes drawn. He shakes his head and tilts it back against the wall. 

"Very sober actually." He laughs. 

"I've noticed." Josh says, it's more of a whisper and he takes another drag, smoke inflating his lungs. Brendon doesn't seem to mind the smoking, no looks of disgust about how nicotine is bad for you, in fact he seems more amused if anything. 

"So you've seen me?" Brendon knows the answer already, Josh is just slightly embarrassed. He could say the same to Brendon but he holds off and raises an eyebrow. 

"I've seen everyone." Josh says in his defence. Brendon sees straight through it but Josh doesn't notice, Josh smokes some more and flinches every time there's the sound of lightning in the distance. Concern flashes on Brendon's face for a moment, Josh collects himself. It's okay to be scared of storms he tells himself. 

"But you remember me." Brendon's cocky, smug, he's unbuttoning his blazer, button by button. Josh doesn't ask why, he diverts his attention back up. 

"I do." 

"Who else have you noticed?" He raises an eyebrow, arms crossed, still leaning against the side of the bar. Josh isn't sure why it matters, he knows his answer though and by the look on Brendon's face he knows it too. 

Josh furrows his brows, he flinches when a drop of water lands on his forehead. He flicks his cigarette. "People." He says. 

"Tyler?"

"Sure." Josh is a bit taken aback for a moment, then he's not, he's merely unsurprised. Tyler seems to get around and so does Brendon. Crossing paths isn't unlikely. Brendon is smug, he tugs his suit jacket. 

"You know him?" Josh asks.

"You could say that." Brendon shrugs, head resting against the bricks. 

"You've slept with him?" Josh suggests, his hand raising slightly as he speaks. 

"You can say that too." He lets out a slight laugh, it's cute and maybe a little mocking but Josh isn't aware of it. 

Josh shrugs, shoulders going up just a bit. "Huh." 

A girl and an older man stumble into the alley, Brendon and Josh both turn and glance over. She gets shoved against the wall, man attacking her neck. Josh is only slightly uncomfortable and he furrows his brows when Brendon laughs. The girls legs are wrapped around this guy's waist and Josh can't look away, Brendon stares and glances at Josh carefully. 

"Find somewhere else to fuck." He yells, hands cupping his mouth. Josh grins. The two don't stop though and Brendon laughs and leans back against the wall. They can barely hear the two anyways, there's rain, there's traffic on the road and music is pulsing. Josh smokes some more and ignores the urge to peek past the garbage and watch. 

The silence breaks, the storm doesn't. 

"Come home with me?" Brendon asks, he taps on his chin. Josh flushes, shakes his head and glances to his side. Josh isn't sure if it's hopeful or not. 

"You can walk me home." He drops his cigarette, smoke billowing as it falls into a puddle of murky water, there's a coke can too. It's crushed. 

Brendon leans in, hand on Josh's shoulder, lips by his ear. "So you don't want me to fuck you?" He says and Josh shivers, he considers it and leans back against the door, he can feel and hear everything going on inside. He's been outside too long. 

"Maybe some other time." 

"Do you want Tyler to fuck you?" Brendon asks carefully and Josh thumbs with his fingers. 

He avoids the question. "You've got a way with words." Brendon looks smug, he's holding back laughter. His smile is bright and he removes his blazer and lays it over his shoulder like a rag. He bites the inside of his cheek and tilts his head. 

"I'd hope so, i'm a writer." 

Josh nods his head. "Don't seem like the type." It's not awkward he tells himself. 

"I've heard that before." And Brendon's laughs heartily, it's pretty. 

Josh rests against the door a while longer before rain starts pouring down harder and he doesn't want to be outside anymore. He flinches when lighting strikes. 

"Nice meeting you but i'm going inside. Ash can't handle the bar without me." 

"i'll be walking you home at the end of your shift." Brendon confirms. Josh isn't against it, if they guy wants to wait he can wait. 

"That's in five hours." Josh says. 

"s'fine." Brendon says easily. A flirt. He's a flirt and Josh is only slightly confused about the Tyler thing. He moves away from the door and fumbles with his pockets for the keys. Brendon is still there, he stares at Josh and Josh laughs nervously as he rushes inside. 

shit.

_____

Brendon walks him home and street lamps flicker and there's a lot less rain, his cigarette is laced with weed, he'd pulled it out of his pocket and stuck it between his lips the moment they'd gotten outside. Josh had pulled out his own. 

It's quiet, headlights from passing cars are their light source. Josh glances nervously at Brendon every few seconds. It's rare that a boy goes home with him with no intention of sleeping with him, rare that anyone walks him home and he's not sure what Brendon's intentions are but he know they aren't bad.   
He knows they aren't bad when they start crossing the street and Brendon's fingers turn in his jacket and pull him back because there's a black car speeding by ready to hit them. 

"Careful." Brendon says. Josh chuckles and falls back beside the crosswalk. 

They can barely see, they walk in silence and Brendon passes his cigarette to Josh every few minutes. It's just slightly cold, Josh is back in his leggings and sweater, they're damp against his skin. 

The laced weed isn't getting Josh too high, he's not taking big hits but he feels himself drifting. 

Brendon follows Josh's lead, they turn down another street, an apartment building comes into view. It starts raining hard again, Josh isn't a fan but Brendon is grinning and he twirls as he walks beside Josh. His hair wet against his forehead. 

"You like the rain?" Josh asks, quietly. He steps in a puddle and water creaks between his toes. His shoe has one hole in it, right in the sole. 

Brendon ruffles his damp hair, flicking water at Josh. "You don't?" 

he kicks water, it sprays the hem of his leggings. "Freaks me the fuck out." He says, he thinks of Jon and he tells himself he hates storms once again as they walk down the street. Cars pass, their headlights bright. Water under the rubber of the tires, it splashes everywhere and luckily not Josh or Brendon. 

"Tyler's the same." Brendon says casually and he lets out a giggle like he's keeping a secret and Josh knows he is. Brendon knows Tyler, Tyler knows Brendon and they both share that damn wrecked jean jacket. Josh knows this. 

He knows this and he stills ponders a question. "W-wait, how do you know him?" 

Brendon shakes his head. "I'll tell you later." Brendon doesn't miss a beat with his reply, he already knew Josh was gonna ask.

"Later?" Josh furrows his brows, and stops beside a mail box and pulls his sweater closer, it clings to him, his hood is wet. Brendon sighs and turns towards him, he raises an eyebrow. 

"You are inviting me inside right?" 

"I don't usually take guys home. at all." It's a lie. Josh leans.

"Not to fuck." Brendon says like it's supposed to reassure Josh. It does but it doesn't. "it's late and I live far." Brendon is soft and quiet as he speaks, his voice overlaying over the rain that hadn't calmed all day. Josh leans on the mailbox, one hand on the wet metal the other on his chin. 

"So you want to sleepover?" Brendon nods, he's not forceful but at the same time he is. He's charming, Josh will give him that. 

"You're a stranger." Josh reminds him, he gets closer to him and pulls his hood up more when his red locks are damp with stray rain drops. Rain wets his fingers and he just wants to get home. 

"Let me sleepover." Brendon says. 

Brendon sleeps over. 

___

Josh is conscious as Brendon follows him into his apartment. The hallway outside is empty and barren and the lights flicker just a bit, just one of them. Brendon's on his phone typing away and Josh feels his nerves ease, and he grabs Brendon when he almost walks into the wall, he tsks and Brendon grins at him always, in a good mood.  

Oscar and Bear greet Brendon at the door and Josh hadn't seen anyone get so excited about cats. He was automatically sitting on the floor, both animals purring and rubbing against him. They both ignore Josh and he's not surprised. 

"Water?" He asks. Josh is good with house guests. He streaks off his hoodie and throws it on the floor on the way to the kitchen.

"Please." Brendon says, Oscar's in his lap and  Brendon is smiling so wide. Josh feels warm.  

He grabs a glass and runs it under the water tap and Brendon's still on the floor with his two cats, Josh rolls his eyes. 

"You can uh-have the couch, ill grab you a pillow and blanket." He says and Brendon nods. 

Josh isn't uncomfortable, he's had people stay over before but Brendon was different. He grabs him a thick wool blanket, his apartment has a constant draft. He tucks it into the couch right beside Brendon, he looks tired. His cheekbones hollow and under eyes purple. Josh doesn't know why he'd walk him home if he was this exhausted. The lighting of his appartement makes everything clearer. 

Brendon's texting when Josh cones back in with a pillow. "Here." It's an embroidered one with a blue pillow case shoved over top. He passes it over. 

"Thanks, a lot Josh." 

Josh nods. "No problem. If you pull anything i'll call the police though." He says honestly, lips pursed, he bites them. Brendon only giggles and clutches the blanket Josh had brought out. 

"Don't worry. I'm a nice guy, I won't do shit."


	4. Chapter 4

_______

Josh wakes up with sunlight irritating his eyes, he's warm, his duvet is throw on the floor and he's wrapped himself around one of his pillows. He pulls the pillow closer in comfort, Josh always wants comfort. He pulls it from everywhere. His toes curl and he lets out a loud breath. 

His cats aren't on the edge of his bed, they aren't curled up by him. They usually sleep by him, warm and just there. His cats had always been there beside him while he slept and as he squirms in bed for comfort, fingers scratching at the sheets he realizes that they aren't there. 

It doesn't take long for him to draw the conclusion that his cats had betrayed him and slept alongside Brendon on his too small couch. Josh had checked up on Brendon multiple times throughout the night and each time he felt creepier because Brendon had barely moved, his fingers were curled around the blanket Josh had thrown on top of him and his legs were pulled up closer to his stomach. He was picturesque. 

Josh doesn't move until he hears footsteps creaking around his house and tiny meows. Josh isn't even weirded out, having someone in the house doesn't weird him out. Even if this person is a stranger, a stranger who his cats like better than him. He doesn't move until he hears water running in the kitchen. 

Having strangers over isn't weird, it's not unfamiliar to Josh and the biggest difference is that for once he didn't sleep with this stranger. Brendon's different he tells himself, over and over. Usually he'd be on his back, he'd be on top, he'd be panting and moaning, sometimes he'd be on his knees, he would beg and Josh would be needy the moment he's behind closed doors. Not always though. He prefers people coming to his place, theres a sense of security bringing them over, it's more comfortable for him although now having a stranger know his address. If they can't make it to his place, it's somewhere else. Somewhere where they shouldn't be fucking and Josh is fine with that too. By now Josh and Brendon would've fucked but for once Josh holds off on the offer he'd received and Brendon respects it and he stays and he sleeps with Josh's cats curled up on his chest. 

There's more noise outside his room and he takes that as his cue to get up, he's lazy, his hair is messy and in every direction and he doesn't even bother putting on clothes, which leaves him in spider man boxer briefs and a long shirt. His feet are cold and he crosses his arms to warm himself up when he reaches the kitchen. 

Brendon's still on the couch, he's on his phone texting, legs hanging off the arms of the couch, head on the cushions. Oscar is on his stomach and Josh can't help but stare for a second. 

Brendon looks over, he smiles and puts down his phone, holding himself up by an elbow to see Josh. "Morning." He says. He looks much more put together than Josh, his clothes from last night are still on, his skin is clear and he's clearly in a good mood. 

"Hey." Josh is quiet, Brendon backs off and makes no attempts at conversation, he diverts back to the two cats sitting on him.  
Josh is glad. He's still only half awake as he takes slow attentive steps to the corner of his kitchen where his prized coffee maker stands. 

He turns to Brendon. "Coffee?" He asks tiredly, Keurig already dispensing his. 

"Please." 

Josh nods, Josh makes them coffee while Brendon plays with the two cats, they jump around him and rub against him and Oscar sits on one of his legs while Bear snuggles into his stomach causing Brendon to lay down.  He pets them and the apartment is quiet other than Brendon whispering to the cats and Josh taking out mugs and creamer.

The living room is dark when he sits down, the TV is off and there's just a tiny bit of light poking in through his curtains. Brendon holds his mug, Bear in his lap and Josh curls up on the opposite side of the couch with the blanket Brendon had used wrapped around him. 

Josh counts each sip of caffeine he takes, he watches Brendon for a few seconds before turning on the TV to avoid the void of silence that neither of them were attempting to fill. 

His mug is warm between his fingers and when there's only half left he's done and full and he struggles to reach over and place it on his coffee table. Brendon watches and they make eye contact when Josh settles back into his spot. Neither look away, Brendon's fiddling with the embroidered pillow. 

"Josh." His voice is soft, quiet like there were other people in the appartement. He's toned down in the mornings, Josh decides. He decides that Brendon is more reserved. Josh wants to know more, so much more. 

Josh looks at him in expectancy, he scoots just a bit closer to him too. Brendon doesn't notice. He waits for him, Josh waits and Brendon's voice is somehow even softer, maybe just slightly nervous when he speaks. 

"Can I- do you have a piece of paper? and maybe a pen?" He says, he says it like it's a huge burden and yeah, Josh furrows his brows for a second but he's not about to decline. Brendon looks relieved when his expression goes back to normal. 

"Uh, yeah. Yeah, I do." Josh says, he groans as he gets up, Brendon's smile is small. It takes him longer than he thought it would to find a pen, he pads around his apartment for a bit too long and his eyes narrow when he sees one stuck between strategically pins on the cork board above his dresser. 

He's climbing back on the couch. He's closer to Brendon this time. Josh hands him the paper and Josh holds his chin on his knees, his toes close to Brendon's. He wiggles them. 

Brendon thanks him quietly. He folds the paper three times and brings his knees up like Josh's, the pen rests behind his ear and he's slow, he's so slow and careful. Josh hasn't met anyone like him. 

Brendon takes a deep breath and Josh watches with wide eyes. "Okay, this is going to sound weird but may I analyse you?" 

"analyse me?" Josh repeats. 

"it's for work." He grins, he bites his tongue and then there's this little laugh that Josh wants to hear again. "well it's more for me." 

Brendon shakes his head, and runs a hand through his hair. Josh blinks, he squints and he's not exactly sure what Brendon's talking about. 

"I'm an author, it's good practice for characterization, descriptions and character development. basically i'm in a slump and you're interesting and i'd like to write about you. " Josh doesn't say anything so Brendon continues. 

"It's the same for artists, like Tyler." Brendon says, Josh stills once again. TylerTylerTyler, even when he's not around Josh can't escape him. Brendon doesn't notice Josh go weak, he continues talking, his hands move with his voice and Josh can't look away and can't shake the nagging feeling that he's missing something. "He, he likes to sketch out people whenever he goes out, he draws people all the time. Strangers, especially when he doesn't know what to draw he just well, he does that." 

"What I like to do is more I guess specific. It's based off of a lot of assumptions and things and mannerisms that you do just regularly." He glances around the house a bit. "Your house, your job, that kinda stuff." Brendon shrugs like it's nothing. 

He tilts his head at Josh curiously, he's scratching at the paper now, his nails aren't long and his teeth grind. Josh isn't sure why Brendon's nervous. He's gorgeous though, the dim morning light of his appartement suits him. He looks good, he always seems to.

"It's like a character analysis from like a book or something but on an actual person. It's a bit hard to explain. I don't want to bore you." Brendon says and Josh isn't even close to bored, he thinks he gets it. He likes Brendon talking. 

It sounds invasive, it sounds like he's about picked apart piece by piece and thrown onto paper. He's warm though, he's warm and Josh is always willing. 

"So can I?" Brendon asks, and Josh knows he won't be asking again so he starts nodding, his neck tired and hair messy, he nods. 

"Uh- yea.... sure." He's got nothing to lose, Brendon's a writer. He's interested, he wants to do this. Brendon is smiling now and Josh smiles too but he frowns for a second. He should know this. "How do you know Tyler?" He asks, he asks the question again as he wraps the Blanket further around him and he burrows. Brendon's grin doesn't fade, if anything it grows and Josh's eyes narrow. 

"He's coming to pick me up later. I'll tell you later." Brendon's not waving him off. He's just got to wait and it seems like it's a secret. It shouldn't be one. Josh feels warm again, Brendon and Tyler in one room with him. 

"Okay." Okay. 

There's no questions for the next hour, Josh is on his phone, he's on tumblr, there's porn on his dashboard that he ignores and Brendon is writing. The sound of pen on paper is inhaling Josh's apartment and Brendon is situated on the floor now, his feet under his legs, his unfolded paper filled with words and Josh can't help hut shift focus to them every few minutes. Just because he wants to see, Josh wants to see so badly.

Brendon pushes up his glasses on a regular basis and Josh has been staring for far too long, rocking himself on his couch gently. His cats are gone, doing whatever they do and Josh refuses to move, he stays put sinking into the cushions of his couch. The Tv is gentle, Josh is bored. He doesn't have work for once, he'd tried to pickup the night shift but his boss said he deserved the night off. Josh worked too hard apparently. He knew his family wouldn't agree.

Whenever Josh shifts Brendon's eyes snap up and they look at each other for a few seconds and Josh takes a deep breath every time and lays on his back, Brendon's abandoned pillow under his head.

Josh is making eggs and bacon when Brendon gets up and stretches. Josh was hungry and he had guessed Brendon was too. He stills for a second and turns back, Brendon's folding the paper into his back pocket and Josh says nothing and continues cooking their late breakfast. 

"That took a while." It's Brendon who's speaking, he's joining Josh in the kitchen. He's grown into the comfort of Josh's apartment. That much is clear. He leans on the counter, hands holding him up and Josh inhales and works on not burning the egg in the pan. 

"Yeah, it did." He mumbles, he places the spatula and turns down the heat on the stove top. He's not in the mood to burn down his appartement. 

Josh quirks an eyebrow and turns around, his back to the eggs. "You're not going to read it to me are you?" 

"Ah." Brendon shakes his head and he tsks. "That's the beauty of it. I'll show you one day." Brendon says and Josh internally grumbles. 

"I haven't even showed Tyler his yet." It's for consolation he assumes but every time Brendon brings up Tyler he becomes more curious. He can't not. 

Josh nods to let Brendon knows he's listening. He makes eye contact. 

"I did the exact same thing when I met him." 

"You know i've never heard Tyler talk about you."

"You've talked to him once." Brendon deadpans. He sits himself on top of Josh's counter, his legs swing. Josh doesn't bother commenting that he rather Brendon be standing. Brendon draws attention. 

"He talks about me?" Josh puts the eggs aside, they're cooked. Scrambled almost perfectly. 

Brendon ignores him and he continues what he'd been trying to say before. "The reason I wait to show people my analysations."

Josh cuts him off. "You're a scientist now?" He breaks into laughter and he can tell Brendon is holding back by the way he brings his hand to his mouth and tilts his head back before speaking. 

"The reason I wait is because people can't face the truth and when they read it on paper it freaks them the fuck out." Brendon says. Josh thinks he gets it, things on paper are scarier sometimes. More real. 

"You act like you're always right," 

"For the most part, I am. I'm observant, I understand people." And for some reason Josh thinks that's the most attractive thing. 

"And now you sound cocky and arrogant." He's not facing Brendon anymore, he's pulling out plate from the cupboard beside him. He places them on the counter. 

"But, you know i'm not." The oven beeps. His appartement smells of bacon at 12pm. 

"I don't though, I don't know shit about you." Josh says, he can hear Brendon roll his eyes as he slips the bacon out of the oven. Green oven mitts on his hands. Smoke meets his face, there's a bit of a cough but he manages to set it to the side with ease before turning back to his guest. 

"You do, you know things." Brendon smiles cheekily. 

Brendon's right. 

___ 

Tyler shows up at Josh's appartement in loose overalls with a Ohio hoodie underneath. He's got this wild smile, his eyes are bright and Josh is sure he's wearing dark blue eyeliner to match his toes. It's a little messy but it's cute. Everything is cute.

"Hey." Josh says. Tyler's smiling. Josh didn't think the next time he'd see Tyler would be at his own house. 

"Hi." 

Josh moves out of the doorway to let Tyler see. 

On the couch Brendon lies, one foot on the floor, his other knee hiked up. He's sleeping and Josh looks at him and Tyler's head pokes beside Josh to see him. 

"Was he a bother?" Tyler whispers, he bites the inside of his cheek. 

Josh looks at him. He's just a little bit shorter. "Yeah, no he was good." 

"You guys didn't fuck?" Josh shakes his head, cheeks red. 

"No." And Tyler hums in approval. 

Tyler follows Josh inside, they don't talk and Tyler goes straight over to Brendon, a warm hand on his cheek. He leans in, knees by the floor. Josh cleans up their remaining dishes, they make little noise in the sink and he looks over to see Tyler's fingers in Brendon's hair, he's waking him up, he's gentle. 

Tyler strokes his hair and Brendon yawns as he sits up properly, pulling Tyler to sit beside him. Josh cleans the dishes and cleans up the kitchen. 

Josh brings Oscar with him when he sits down as far away from Tyler and Brendon as possible. Oscar trots over to the them anyways and Josh pouts. Tyler reaches and Oscar goes straight into his lap. 

"Fuck, I love cats." He scratches Oscar's head and turns to Brendon. "How could you not tell me he has cats." Brendon just shrugs and Tyler continues petting Oscar happily. 

"They both seem to like you guys more than me." Josh says, Brendon throws an arm around Tyler and rests his chin on his shoulder. His hands go around his waist. 

Brendon shakes his head. "Not true, they were meowing at your door last night." 

"So they settled for you because you decided to be selfish and not open Josh's door when they wanted their father." Tyler says, he looks at Brendon only having to turn his head a bit. 

"I needed heat and it's not like Josh was gonna cuddle me." Brendon says, he sounds whiny and he pouts. Tyler blows a raspberry and Josh tilts his head back in laughter. 

"S'okay, maybe I would've let you in my bed." 

"See Josh would've cuddled you." Tyler says, he kisses Brendon's cheek and Josh feels himself wanting the same treatment. 

Josh puts fight club on when Tyler's too focused on Oscar and Brendon is dozing off, his legs hiked over Tyler's lap. He feels comfortable with the two, they're still nearly strangers but he figures it isn't a big deal. He turns up the volume just enough and it's goes quiet again. It was weird seeing them like this, in such a calm state. They weren't at a bar, there was nothing lewd about it. The three were just on the couch, barely speaking. 

"So you gonna tell me now?" Josh whispers to Tyler. Brendon's still asleep again. Josh hoped he wasnt this tired because the couch was uncomfortable. He felt bad. 

"Boyfriends." Tyler hums gently not looking at Josh. Josh nods and smiles, he pulls a blanket off the floor and brings it back up onto his lap. Tyler watches him and he tugs for his own piece. Josh's appartement is still cold, the draft he'd gotten used to most shivering in the living room. 

"You're together?" Josh asks, he scoots closer and he pets Oscar who's resting on Tyler's leg. Tyler just hums in agreement and pet's Oscar along side Josh. His fingers between her ears. 

"We're together." 

Tyler shrugs happily, his eyes flutter shut a few times. It's not even late into the afternoon. He rolls up his sweater's sleeves, shades of purple paint coat his arms. It's thick, the streaks are large and Josh can't help but stare. 

"Do you mix on your arms?" He asks, his fingers grazing over Tyler's arms. He should've asked but Tyler didn't mind, he scooted even closer to Josh, Oscar jumps out of his lap. 

Tyler shakes his head. "I used to, I still do sometimes but I just got this fucking huge palette and I refuse to use anything else." Brendon lets out a snore, Tyler looks at him for a second before looking back at Josh. 

"I clean off my brushes on my arms though." He presents them to Josh again. "I'm too lazy to dry them off in between." 

"You paint everyday?" 

"Mostly yeah, it's not always people." 

"I only paint like the ones you saw the other day when I can get our hookups to stay still long enough for a painting. Honestly it's a mess but fuck it's fun to do." Tyler says easily, his eyes gleam. 

Josh is gentle, his finger tips are on Tyler's arms. Tyler doesn't seem to mind. 

"When you pick people up from bars... do you and..." Josh starts asking a question, he pulls away from Tyler.

Tyler's grin widens and he pulls down his sleeves, blue nails digging into them. "Me and Brendon and them." 

"Threesomes?" 

"Usually yeah. The most people i've slept with all together was." He's counting his fingers, Brendon's snoring and Oscar's putting." six, 4 cunts, 3 dicks." He smiles again and Josh is surprised, he doesn't even know what to say. 

"Strap-ons count yeah?" Tyler's asks, amused. He pulls the blanket completely off the floor, making sure it covers everyone. He spreads it up over Brendon's chest, all the way to Josh's lap. Josh nods and curls his fingers around it. 

"Yeah." He adjusts himself. 

"Ever used sex toys Josh? since we're talking about em." Josh goes red but he nods. The last drawer of his dresser is where he keeps them. He hadn't got many. It's rare that he even uses them. 

"I have." 

"Alone?" And Josh knows what Tyler wants him to answer. 

"Mostly, i'm pretty lonely I guess." Josh takes a deep breath and Tyler leans forward and Brendon groans in protest as Tyler gets further away from him and closer to Josh. 

"Join us sometime, not even for sex. Just come over to our place, you can meet Cory." 

"Who's Cory?" 

"You have to come over to find out." 

"Is that an invite?" 

"Do you want it to be?"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Comments and kudos are super cool and holy shit this is already one of the longest things i've written and i love it so feedback would be cool


	5. Chapter 5

___

Josh likes smoking, he likes the burn in his lungs, he like how warm he feels and he likes watching the ash fall. The smell is even better. Jon's couch smells of smoke just like his appartement does. Jon's apartment is a mirror image of his, looks exactly like it did when he showed up crying in his pyjamas. This time Josh is in a good mood and he's alone, mostly. 

Two girls stand, hands in each other's pockets, sharing a cigarette, leaning out an open window as they smile and smoke and they aren't the only ones. Jon's apartment is a sanctuary of nicotine and Josh is a guest. 

He's on the couch, one leg up, chin on his knee, unlit cigarette behind his ear and a bottle of beer he's been nursing for the past half hour on his lap in between his legs. Jon's house is home to friends of his, Josh included. It's not rare that he's like this, that he's curled up on jon's couch as everybody else has a good time because really Josh is only here because he doesn't want to be alone and the bar once again messed up his scheduling and double booked. 

Oreo is set in Josh's house for the night. Jon not wanting his dog to endure or get sick off of second hand smoking. He doesn't want him around for when people starting going at it, on the couch, in his room, against the wall. Jon is considerate and very lucky Josh's cats get along perfectly fine with Oreo. 

Music pulses from a tiny speaker set on top of the oak TV stand. Josh is unfocused, completely uncaring as he watches everybody with squinted eyes. Josh observes calmly in a way he hopes isn't creepy because if there's one thing Josh isn't, it's creepy. If anything he's just curious and that's the only excuse he's got as he watches a guy pull Jon into his room by his belt. They meet eyes and Jon grins, closing the door behind him.

Josh groans, bored but unwilling to move. His eyes roam, they land on a small group nestled on the floor passing a joint. He recognizes nobody but everybody, everyone's familiar. He's seen them all before. They're all on each other, all lazy. All willing and soft and they're high, sulking on rose petals. 

He looks to the girls again, they're kissing now. Cigarettes disposed in the ashtray by the window sill. 

Everyone's involved in each other, Josh is involved with his beer. 

The group on the floor parts within the next thirty minutes, some leave gasping against each others mouths and other's leave giggling and holding onto each other as they leave. The bed creaks in Jon's room and Josh gets up, going to the kitchen, stepping over a girl laying on top of some man's legs. They're just laying, doing nothing. Some of the last left and he knows he won't be surprised to see them all over each other later on because Josh. Josh is staying. 

"Sorry." He says quietly. Nobody cares to listen. Too interested, overwhelmed. Josh isn't either. They say nothing and they wouldn't have said anything if Josh had stepped on them. 

He loses his beer, leaving it on the counter and then he's tugging on his sweater sleeves, stepping over the same two people again and stumbling back into the couch, cushions eating him alive. 

He looks at the girls for a third time, hands moving down, down, down. He watches the development as they push and pull each other around. They look soft and Josh has nothing against girls. They kiss, hands on hips, fingers moving into lower and Josh watches. 

When fingers start to go up a skirt Josh is getting up. He's bored is his excuse. 

"Hey." He says, he leans beside them. They both notice, smiling. 

"Want to join?" One asks, the only one with a mouth free to speak as the other sucks gentle red onto her neck and sneaks fingers inside of her cunt. 

"Please." He says, glancing at the other people in the room before looking back at her. 

"We'll take care of you." She says, bringing Josh in by his jaw, pink nails, soft lips she kisses him and Josh's hand meets the small of the other girls back.

Soft and slow, cigarettes on tongues, they move to the couch. The two girls are gentle all warm touches and sweet kisses and they don't talk. They touch. Hands and lips everywhere. 

Equal attention is divided, Josh ends up between legs, tongue darting into a wet cunt, blunt fingers digging into soft hips. Everything moves fast and Josh kisses them both and they kiss each other. 

Josh is warm, not overthinking, his hands follow curves and soft skin. 

They, the three of them occupy the couch and Jon's headboard rocks against the wall. 

____

He sees Tyler, he's on that street corner again, paintings piled up against the side of the appartement building and he's smiling with an unlit cigarette stuck behind his ear as he rocks from side to side and hums. It's far too cold to be outside. People pass him by, woman glaring at him, some stopping to scold him but from afar Josh can see Tyler doesn't care. 

There's no bother, he's proud of his art work and he's completely shameless. 

Josh approaches. "Hey." He says, he's not in his jogging clothes today. He's tired, sunken in but he's bright in a loose hoodie and jeans. 

Tyler's eyes open, he's smiling wider and he pays no attention to Josh's state. "Hey." 

"Mind if I-" He glances to the spot beside Tyler. He gets the message. 

"Oh, yeah not at all sit down tough guy." Tyler pats the spot with a willing smile. 

So Josh does, he settles, pavement freezing cold, wind gushing, he's pulling his beanie over his ears as he slides down the wall beside Tyler into a sitting position, legs straight out ready to trip by passers. "Fuck."

"Fuck is right." Tyler says, he quirks a little smile at Josh before he's puffing more smoke into himself. Josh sniffles and pulls his left leg up to rest his chin on his knee. There's some silence before Tyler speaks up. 

"Why are you here?" He asks. 

Josh raises his eyebrows. "Do you want me to leave?" He glances behind him. 

Tyler shakes his head, lips upturning into a small smile. "Definitely not." 

He goes pink and Josh blinks, clearing his throat. 

"I have work in thirty minutes, thought i'd stop by and see if you were here." His mouth moves before he has time to process a thing, he feels creepy but Tyler doesn't seem to care. He lets out a deep breath. 

Tyler hums, letting his head drop back against the bricks, rolling his neck slightly, eyes closing. "How thoughtful of you."

"I think Brendon's gonna be at the bar tonight." Is all he says. A man passes by, he steps on Josh's shoe, large boots pinching his toes. Tyler notices, Josh flinches, bringing his other leg up to the safety. He crosses them now. Tyler looks content and Josh asks another question, nearly blushing. 

"Need some new models?" 

"Nope. Brendon's on his own for the night." Tyler says, ash falls onto his jeans, Josh without thinking uses the back of his hand to swipe it off his thigh. 

"That. That doesn't bother you?" Josh asks, eyes wide now. It would bother him, he knows it would but Tyler just shrugs before continuing on. His hand is still on Tyler's thigh, unmoving, he forgets it's there and Tyler doesn't put in an effort to remind him. 

He shakes his head passively." Was my idea. It's like a punishment for him or somethin."

"punishment?" He repeats, eyebrows drawn as he retracts his hand and brings it to hide in the kangaroo pocket of his hoodie. 

"He's not a huge fan of one on one stuff, unless it's with me." Tyler raises an eyebrow. 

"Did he do something?" 

"He came in my mouth and I swallowed some before I could spit it out." He sighs. "I am not a fan." Then Tyler's giggling and Josh follows suit, not because it's funny. Josh is near pink all over but it's unnoticeable because how cold it is. Everyone has rosy cheeks including Tyler. He laughs because Tyler's laugh is contagious. 

Tyler stops, he wipes a stray tear from his eye. "I wish I was kidding."

"It's always grossed me out." Josh says.

"Y'don't swallow Joshie?" Josh is pink again, he's blushing. Tyler looks at him. This is normal. 

"N-not usually. I guess it depends." 

"On?" Tyler presses, Josh's levels of embarrassment rise just slightly. 

"Who I'm with. How much they want me to. I'm here to please." 

Tyler giggles, bringing his cigarette back to his lips. "You are a pleasure Josh."

"I am generous." He is. Josh is generous. 

"Can't disagree with that." 

A red car passes by, loud music playing as they stop at a red light right beside the two. Their conversation stops momentarily. Like a breach, they both shut up for a few seconds. Train of thought lost as Josh thinks of something else when it drives away. 

"So have you got any new paintings?" Josh's tone is raised, volume slightly louder. 

Tyler blinks, turning his head. "Huh?"

"New paintings?" He says louder. Tyler lights up. 

"Oh, yeah. of Brendon actually, he's my muse." He's smiling, teeth clenched around the tip of his cigarette. Toxic insides of the smoke crushing in his mouth, he pays no mind to it. His attention is on Josh and Josh's attention is on him. 

"That's lame." 

Tyler smiles and flicks the ash off his cigarette. "But it sounds fucking romantic." He says as he rests his head against the brick wall before looking at Josh. "It's a good line. It works, tell someone you're an artist, say they're your muse and magic." He leans in. 

"Sure." Josh rolls his eyes. Tyler is ridiculous. 

There's comfortable silence for several seconds before Tyler's touching him. Cold fingers is what Josh would feel if he wasn't covered in layers of warmth. 

"Hey, hey Josh." He's poking his shoulder now, long nails digging into his jacket over and over again although already having all of Josh's attention. Tyler's smiling as he does so. 

"Wh-"

"You're my muse." he cuts him off slyly, Tyler's sly, his personality not at all matching his smaller demeanour. Josh goes fucking pink, stupidly pink and he goes warm too and Tyler's laughing. Laughing prettily as he crushes his cigarette into cold pavement. 

"I got you to blush." He sing-songs happily, he's smiling wide, bottom teeth crooked. Josh can't help but notice. 

"You didn't." Josh frowns. 

Tyler raises an eyebrow before standing up, a hand on his stomach. "Oh fuck you, I did." He laughs again, Josh doesn't move, hands pulling at his hair, tangling along near his scalp. He scratches awkwardly, watching Tyler stumble along and gather some of his painting's in his arms. 

"Worked on Brendon, works on everyone." He murmurs under his breath. Josh gets up too, standing awkwardly as he watches Tyler start to clean up. Pretty boy turns to him, head motioning to a stack of paintings. The theme something Josh doesn't bother making out. 

"Wanna help me bring these up?" He asks. 

"Up?"

"My apartment. Help me bring them inside."

"Oh uh, wait did you even." He glances to the paintings. "Did you even sell any today?" 

Tyler shakes his head."Nah, I haven't been out for long and i'm freezing." He gathers them carefully into his arms, small canvases overtop of bigger ones. 

"Do you usually like sell some?"

"You'd be surprised by how many people actually buy these. Now help me bring these up?" 

"Yeah, okay." Josh breaths loud.

Silently the two collect everything into their arms, canvases big enough to hold. A small series of twelve spread between the two. Josh tries his best not to stare at them too long. Knowing the story that most likely plays behind them has him blushing too much and he doesn't want to appear embarrassed because he's really not. 

Tyler holds his paintings like they're nothing, one almost falling out of the pile. He realizes his hands are full as Josh starts walking closer to him. 

"Wait grab my backpack."

Josh grabs his backpack, putting the paintings on the ground carefully, slipping it on his shoulders and then picking them back up. Tyler grins at him, he's happy and he starts walking, leading the way for Josh. 

Josh follows Tyler, his appartement is the one they were just leaning on. Grey bricks. The inside is small, grey carpet, old paint, fake plants. It's nicer than Josh's building. 

The apartment itself is a mess, canvases cover the walls, there's skids of paint across the wood floor yet although it's a mess it's absolutely him. Josh's imagination doesn't bypass anything like this and he's in awe as he walks around. 

"Thanks." Tyler says as Josh places them on a coffee table. 

"Your place is nice." 

"My place." He takes a breath, dropping the rest of his canvases on a yellow couch covered in mismatched pillows. "Is a mess. I blame Brendon." He shrugs.

"I like yours better." Tyler says as he opens his backpack, letting it rest on the couch as he toys with the zipper. 

"I'm gonna have to dis-" His phone goes off, the classic alarm all Iphones are set with by default. It's loud and annoying and he groans, pulling it out of his pocket. Tyler's not paying attention and Josh rolls his eyes as he watches Time For Work 1PM continue to go off. He turns off the alarm, looking at Tyler as he slides his phone back into his pocket. 

"I've gotta go." He says.

Tyler turns and nods in understanding. "Want my number?" 

"Uh. Yeah."

Tyler smiles, fishing a black sharpie out of his bag. 

Too lazy to search for paper he daintily grabs Josh's arm and slides up his sleeve. Ink cold he slides it over his skin, imprinting the series of numbers gently. 

"Thanks." He smiles but then frowns. "I've really gotta go." 

"Don't let Bren do something stupid." Is the last thing Tyler says. 

 

____

The bar is clean when he gets there, single TV already on. 

"You're late." Ashley groans, sitting on top of the bar, apron snug around her waist as she scrolls through her phone. 

"It's fucking empty." He says. They aren't even open yet, he's five minutes early. 

"Still late. I hate being alone." Ashley frowns, jumping up off the counter as Josh joins her behind the bar and lets his sweater fall to the floor. He kicks it underneath, beside the garbage. 

"You'll need to deal with it sometimes." He murmurs, grabbing a glass and filling it with water from the tap. 

"Yeah, yeah."

"Just us tonight?" He asks, nails tapping as Ashley smiles. 

"Yeah. Just us."

He furrows his eyebrows. "Thought boss was swinging by." 

"Well. You thought wrong." 

Her attention goes to the TV before her eyes widen. She turns to Josh and taps on his shoulder. "Can you go grab some more glasses from the back? We've been running short lately." She says as she begins lining up some shot glasses and going over the inventory for the night. 

Josh laughs. "Have you been stealing them again?"

Ashley doesn't answer but she winks and that's enough for Josh as he goes to do what he's been told.

-

Brendon does show up that night. He's not wearing a jean jacket with a tear but he's wearing a leather jacket, an old one without paint on it that Josh has never seen before. He smiles at him, catching his attention. Brendon grins wide, nodding him off as he sits down on a cushioned couch. 

Josh gets back to work, the rush of seeing someone he knows making him smile. 

He's slow. The bar isn't crazy full. People are scattered, low music plays and the TV is louder. Free time is frequent, he talks to Ashley, she watches the TV. People leave, others come in like any other night. 

Everybody is slow. Nights like these have Josh sleepy, he's already tired and it's not like he's done more than stand and pour dozens of simple drinks. He glances at Brendon whenever he gets the chance, eye contact gets made most times and Josh looks away and finds some other way to occupy himself. 

Time passes, the bar's still quiet, no hook-ups in the bathroom. 

Across the bar by the TV a fist flies into some kids stomach. Josh watches, quickly running over as the smaller of the two gasps. He's mad, looking to return the favour when Josh gets between the two. Fingers open, pushing on their chests to back them up. 

"Hey. Break it up guys." Josh says, cutting in between the two. Arms pushing them apart again. A crowd forms, a small one and Josh pushes, pushes, pushed until the two men are opposing. The smaller one runs.

"Coward." The red one says, angry, drunk, pulsing he stares at Josh. Giving him a shove. 

"Hey!" Brendon says, pushing in. Someone grabs him back. Josh doesn't notice. 

The red one, sweaty, drunk, his fist swings, arm following and crushing into Josh's nose and then cheek bone. Josh stumbles back, hand to his jaw in surprise. Red kicks his knee, Red spits on the floor beside him, the crowd makes room, in awe, terrified and he leaves with heavy stomps. 

"Fuck." Josh says gasping, falling to the floor. His head hurts. Everything spins. 

"Josh you okay?" It's Ashley. He recognizes her. 

"Get me a rag." He withers out as people get back to what they'd been doing, nursing their drinks and searching for hookups. Ashley is fast but she's not back before Brendon slides in beside him, crouching down, hand going to Josh's waist slow and tentitive. He gives him a gentle squeeze, hand going to push hair out of his face. 

"Are you alright? He asks. 

Josh groans, a finger swiping underneath his eye. There's blood. "Fucking fantastic." 

"Here." Ashley hands him a cold rag, wiping her fingers off on her apron. "Do you wanna go home? I'll call someone in." She says knowing she can't cover his shift for him. 

Josh nods and Ashley sympathetically pats his shoulder and pulls out his phone. 

"My head hurts, holy shit."

"I'll take you to mine if you want. I don't think it's a good idea for you to walk home.

"O-okay." He says, not giving any thought to it. 

___

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yikes. I haven't updated in a bit. Sorry :( I hope this is good!!! Also I have a youtube type AU thing that i'm working on rn and i'm real excited about it.


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tyler and Brendon take care of Josh.

Brendon holds Josh's waist, his fingers touching underneath his shirt when he leads him to his apartment. He holds him when he whisks him into an elevator. He holds onto him like he's incapable of doing anything but Josh doesn't mind. 

His head is dizzy, spinning, his nose possibly broken or fractured, bleeding everywhere and his knee is bringing him to a limp.

He can barely remember the apartment building although having just been there.He does recognize the fake plants on the way up though, he recognizes the ugly striped burgundy wallpaper too. he fades in it out of consciousness throughout but Brendon doesn't notice because he's pulling him around like a rag doll. Josh is clinging to him subconsciously.

He tastes metal, smacking his lips as he leans on Brendon with most if not all his weight. Brendon is warm, his head is pounding. Brendon is safe and Brendon is the only reason he can stand up properly for the moment.

Brendon is still holding him when he pushes into his appartement and Josh says. "I feel like shit." 

There's silence. Keys clatter and then they're in, it's not warm at all, in fact it's freezing but Tyler appears all smiles, he's in his overalls, no shirt underneath, bare torso. One of the straps is dangling. 

"Hey." He starts, leaning. He blinks. "Wait Josh?" 

Brendon nods. He helps Josh into Tyler's arms and Josh complies with a grunt, arms wrapping around Tyler's shoulders. Tyler feels much smaller than him in that moment albeit being taller as Josh invades his space.

Josh groans, fingers to his nose, blood stains them. "Got hit." 

Tyler holds him tighter, he squeezes his waist. "Oh." 

Brendon's coat falls to the floor, he rushes by and goes into the kitchen that's separates them with a tiled half-wall. "Run him a bath." 

"Whoa. I'm clean." Josh giggles.

"It'll feel good." Brendon shrugs as he sets a rag in the sink.

"I feel fine." 

Josh sighs, detaching himself from Tyler to lean on the wall. Weight on his shoulder. "You just want to see me naked." He points out, he squints. 

Tyler laughs and grabs for his arm to bring him back into his hold, Josh decides it's nice and melts into his touch. "Maybe." 

Brendon rolls his eyes and repeats. "Run him a bath."

Brendon's back on Josh in a few moments, pressing the wet cloth to his bloody nose while Tyler holds him softly. The cloth soaks up the steady stream of blood escaping his nose. 

Josh doesn't know why it's that important to take a bath but he's too tired to say no. 

"I'll take a bath." 

"Yeah. Here take my hand." Tyler says.

Josh does take his hand and he uses it as a crutch, more-so leaning against Tyler's shoulder because it hurts too much to walk on his left leg. Brendon disappears into the living room and Tyler hums as he drags Josh along towards the bathroom. Josh has a limp. He can feel a bruise forming, big and blue as he lets Tyler pull him over down a long hallway. His knee feels like it's been kicked in and his head feels heavy. 

Josh wobbles and Tyler keeps him as steady as he can until he's able to set him atop of the lid of the toilet. 

The bathroom is tiny compared to the rest of the appartement. Josh feels claustrophobic as Tyler closes the door and places the back of his hand against Josh's forehead like a parent would to an ill child. 

He furrows his eyebrows and stares, eyes crossing so he can sort of see him as he keeps his bleeding nose at bay. "I'm not sick." 

Tyler grins. "Just checking. What hurts?" 

"Everything." He groans, leaning back and letting his elbow rest on the cluttered counter, body slumping against the ceramic of the toilet.

Tyler doesn't say anything after that, he runs Josh a bath, it's nearly steaming and Josh is sure being boiled in a bathtub is not comfortable but then Tyler turns the knob for cold water and Josh floods with relief. He even smiles albeit the ache in his jaw and leg as Tyler pours in bubble bath to mix with the running water. 

"Check the water." He says after the bath is nearly over flowing. 

Josh dips his hand in, suds of bubbles resurfacing with it. It's warm, he nearly shudders, having underestimated how good a bath might feel. He leans back, Tyler is staring at him concerned. 

He purses his lips. "Is that okay?"

Josh nods. "Yeah." 

He shifts, trying to get up but failing to put any weight on his left leg. It's swelling and he's scared to check his injury. He pleads at Tyler. "Can you just help me up?" 

Tyler is on it without a word, wrapping an arm around his waist and pulling him up with ease. Josh follows the movement and subconsciously grabs onto him tighter. 

He then stares at the water, ignoring the way his body is aching. He wants to turn, wants to look at Tyler, their faces unbelievably close to one another. If Josh was to turn his head anymore they'd be kissing.

He feels awkward though, Tyler smiles and cautiously lets go of him. "Okay well I'll let you do your thing." 

As an after thought Josh shivers, stares at Tyler and carefully asks. "Actually do you think you could help me?"

Tyler pauses. "With?"

"Getting in, its just y’know, my leg. Can’t put much weight on it” 

Tyler clears his throat. "Yeah, I'll help you." 

And Tyler's back in, sitting himself onto the counter as he waits, nearly sliding into the bowl of the sink, he's small enough. 

Josh peels off his shirt, still sitting on the lid of the toilet and he knows Tyler is watching him as he leans his back against the mirror. He lets out a deep breath, curling the material of his shirt against his stomach.

Josh guesses Tyler isn't surprised or is just good at hiding it when he grins and asks. "Do you need help with that too?" 

"Please." 

Tyler seemingly having some type of experience with the removance of chest binders is quick to hop off the counter and help Josh. Josh unbothered by his own nudity still turns his back to Tyler, straddling the closed toilet as he lets him roll up the bottom of his binder, fingers hooking underneath the tight material and pulling until it reaches his neck, Josh doing the same in the front. 

Once it's off Josh takes a deep breath, hands cupping over his chest, he's nearly flat but his binder makes him feels safer. His nipples perk up, he's cold and Tyler is placing his binder on the counter beside him. Josh's ribs hurt, he knows the skin his binder always pinches at is red and marked. He always wears it for too long and today is no exception. 

He covers himself and turns around, Tyler is bright pink but frowning at the state of his ribs. He says nothing and peers into the water before shuffling closer to the tub one last time. He hums. 

Tyler smiles. "I'll just turn round' and you can use my hand to get in." 

Josh takes a deep breath. "You can look. I-I honestly don't care." 

"Not yet." So Tyler turns around, mostly, he's looking at the bathroom door, hand out and open for Josh to use. 

And Josh doesn't really know what he means by that but he doesn't think too much into it as he pulls down his pants and underwear and grabs Tyler's hand with a strong grip so he can step into the tub. The moment his feet meet the squish of the bath tub mat there's a string of pain coursing through by his knee. He wants to touch it and hold his leg but he can't and instead feels it start to collapse. 

"Shit."

Tyler freezes, tightening his hand around Josh's, not willing to turn around. "Are you okay?" 

"I'm fine." Josh let's go of his hand, pulling Tyler slightly as he sits down into the bath water, bringing his knees to his chest, bubbles sticking to his chest and back. The water stings at his leg injury, otherwise not touching at his jaw or nose. His hair is still dry. 

Comfortably he sighs and pokes at Tyler's hip. It's an alert, he wants him to turn around and Tyler does, scratching at his shoulder as he does so. 

"God, your nose." 

Josh curls his fingers against his good knee. "Hm?"

Tyler sighs, shuffling for the bloodied wash cloth Josh had been nursing and carelessly throwing it into the bath water to soak it before ringing it out. 

Josh watches, blinking harshly as he takes the cloth from Tyler. He presses it, material tickling his nostrils as he pushes it to block more blood from soiling the already pink toned water.

All nasally, Josh says. "Thank you." 

Tyler leaves a little bit after that, telling him before hand that he was free to use whatever soaps he wanted and to call when he needed to get out, he leaves spare clothes on the counter too, not bothering to specify who they belong too, his or Brendon's, but he expects it doesn't really matter since they seem to share most of everything. 

He ends up nearly falling asleep, warm water making a good blanket from the chilling cold of the bathroom but when he rubs his finger tips together and feels them pruning he knows he's been in for too long. So he calls for Tyler only for Brendon to show up with a large fluffy towel thrown over his shoulder. 

It's all very domestic and just like Tyler, Brendon makes no comments about his binder or the state of his body, he’s not even looking at Josh, head tilted elsewhere as he grips the corners of the towel and holds it open while Josh struggles to get up and when Josh is standing, cheeks crimson, Brendon wraps the towel around him and says. "You already look better." 

And Josh is blushing, red hair stuck to his forehead, curling by the belt of his neck. "Doubtful." 

*

Josh sleeps on the couch, a wet rag wrapped around his knee to soothe the swelling with an ice pack underneath it. Tyler and Brendon check on him throughout the night, setting a water bottle for him when he starts coughing in his sleep and setting Tylenol pills on the coffee table for him. 

Josh wakes up during the night when he hears the window to the fire escape open. He's half asleep, eyes lazily trying to make out what's going on but he only gets a soft smile from Tyler who's got a cigarette in between his teeth and a large sweater that sticks all the way down to his mid-thighs. Josh falls back asleep after Tyler tip toes back inside, hair sprinkled with water because of course it's raining. 

He falls back asleep when Tyler sits on the small space between Josh's body and where the couch ends and soothes fingers through his hair and sets warm kisses to his temples. Josh doesn't question it, he melts and falls back into sleep because god how could he not? 

He wakes up again at a more normal hour, the sun peeking through the beige blinds that hide the large window that prolonges along the length of the living room. 

And he wakes up to singing and humming and the smell of what he hopes is pancakes. Even though he's awake he's not moving, he's idling, eyes closed, enjoying how comfortable he feels and pretending that he doesn't feel like absolute shit. 

He gets up for real when he feels the couch dip where his feet end. He cracks open an eye, then the other and he's surprised, confused and maybe a little shocked because Brendon is holding some form of animal that has him sitting up in a second.

Of course moving hurts like hell, his head is pounding, his nose feels awful, his knee is cold from the now melted ice pack and the blanket he'd been using is sticking to his knee. 

Josh looks at him and then the animal sitting in his lap, more-so just resting there, laying. "What the hell is that?" 

Brendon smiles. "Goodmorning." 

"Brendon what is that?"

Brendon smiles. "Tyler's pet, his name is Cody." 

"He's an overgrown hamster?" 

Brendon laughs at that, not breaking eye contact as Cody jumps off his lap and onto Josh's good leg, he freezes. "He's a fucking chinchilla and he hates me." 

Josh stares at Cody who begins chewing on the pant leg of his borrowed sweatpants. He squints at Brendon, keeping in his amusement. "W-why do you guys have a chinchilla?" 

Brendon shakes his head. "Not We. Just Tyler." 

Cody stares at Josh, Josh stares back and scrunches his nose which hurts more then he cares to admit. "He's so cute." 

"He's a little devil, nothing cute bout' that."

"Don't be bitter because he hates you." Cody is now walking up and down his leg, his whiskers and hairs of his tail sticking out more as he explores. His little paws are much smaller than his cats. 

"Tyler keeps saying I need to bond with him more, so early morning when he's not sleeping yet I take him out of his cage to hang out with me. We take him out at night too, he goes crazy otherwise." 

Josh hums, shuffling around until he's able to sit up properly and let the weight of his torso stay against arm rest of the couch. Cody has nestled himself in between Josh's calves. 

"Speaking of Tyler, where is he?" 

Brendon shrugs and yawns, stretching his arms above his head, tank top exposing a small amount of his stomach. "I think he went to go buy more acrylic paint or some medical shit for you, he told me when he left but I was still half asleep." 

Josh nods, feeling guilty that Tyler may be picking up stuff for him. He doesn't need to do that. "Do you guys have a car?"

Cody makes a noise and Josh stares at him, Brendon is shaking his head. "Ah, not yet, we're saving up for one though. We have some trip planned for next summer and we're gonna need a car, maybe a van, who knows. Tyler wants one of those tiny cars, which I think is a stupid investment. Because why not just get a fucking full sized car?"

"I've always wanted a truck, thought that might be sweet to drive around."

"I just want something that works." Cody is jumping back over to Brendon, behind him on the back cushion of the large couch. 

Brendon hums as he stands up, taking Cody with him without the animal protesting. "Anyways, do you want breakfast? I'm not an awful chef, I promise."

"Yes please."

Brendon, true to his promise doesn't suck at cooking, intact Josh decides as soon as he takes his first bite that these are the best pancakes he'd ever had but he doesn't say that. Cody ends up back in his cage, which is apparently in another room, a small office space they'd converted into Cody's own mini sanctuary that Josh was dying to go see. 

Josh let's Brendon slide a knee brace onto him after Josh insists he doesn't need to go see the doctor. He's fine, nothing is broken, he's just a little battered up and he can tell that Brendon doesn't agree with him but Brendon isn't pushy and settles for Josh letting him check his leg. 

His nose is another story, it's bruised and so is the underside of his jaw but Josh can survive. He really doesn't care whereas Brendon is grabbing him an ice pack from the freezer and wrapping it in a small towel so Josh can hold it to his jaw. 

And Josh does, he does what Brendon's tells him to do and holds the ice pack to his jaw while Brendon sets up Netflix so they can watch the new season of stranger things. 

Brendon had snickered as he'd done so, saying. "Tyler wanted to watch it together, he can catch up later." 

Tyler gets back hours later, a heavy looking backpack clinging to him as Josh stares at him from where Brendon has tucked him in on the couch. They'd made it through two episodes and Brendon is quick to pause the show when Tyler walks over and tosses Josh a chocolate bar. 

Josh grins. "Thank you." 

Brendon is pouting. "What about me?" 

Tyler stares at the TV, and then at Brendon. He gasps. "You did not!" 

Josh unwraps his chocolate bar as Brendon guiltily scoots closer to him. "He did." 

Brendon glares at him. "Josh how could you rat me out?"

"You asshole." Tyler frowns, letting his bag fall to the floor before plopping onto the couch. 

"You've done it to me enough." 

And that's that. Tyler makes them restart from the first episode and Josh has no complaints. Comfortable fitting in between the two of them, head ending up in Brendon's lap, feet on Tyler's. 

"I think it's time for me to head home." Josh sighs when the sun sets, cradling his knee. Brendon raises an eyebrow, an urge for him to finish his thought. "Need to feed my cats, also I can't keep taking time off work."

"Shit, i forgot about your cats." Tyler says. 

"My neighbour Jon has been feeding them." 

"It's only been a day." 

Josh grins and pokes Tyler's shoulder with his foot. "Yeah and I've invaded your apartment." 

Tyler shrugs. "I'll call you a cab." 

"I can walk." Josh starts sitting up, groaning, Brendon's hand on the small of his back. 

"Like hell you are gonna walk." Tyler mutters, picking his phone off the table, he looks at Josh. "That's an awful idea." 

Josh frowns. "You've nursed me back to health, I'm fine." 

Brendon shakes his head. "You've still got that limp going for you pirate." 

Josh groans, laughter falling from his mouth as he pinches his bruised up nose, falling further into the couch cushions. "Is that supposed to be an insult? Jesus Christ." 

Tyler attention on his phone, says. "Brendon sucks at insults, it amazes me he's gotten this far in life without getting a fist to the face for one of his jokes." 

"I think he's pretty funny." 

Brendon stands up. "See I'm fucking hilarious." 

"Now that's not what I said." 

Josh gathers his stuff slowly, pulling on his jacket, limping uncomfortably around the apartment, the knee brace being a great help. Brendon and Tyler tell him to keep the clothes for now, his other shirt stained with blood from his previous nose bleed. Brendon gives him a plastic bag for his clothes and wraps a scarf around his neck because apparently it's freezing. 

"Bye, uh, Thank you both for everything." Josh says awkwardly, standing at the door but neither Tyler or Brendon notice, Tyler pulling him in for a crushing hug, hands around his neck, head nuzzled against his shoulder warmly and Brendon opting to join in, making it a group hug. 

It works as well as it can, Brendon makes them all stumble to the side, Tyler laughing against his shoulder as Josh tries to keep them all standing upwards. "Will I be seeing you guys soon?" 

Tyler grins against his neck. "For sure."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I suck at updating things and I’ve been in a sort of writing slump. 
> 
> AH AND it’s revealed. Josh is the trans character in this fic.
> 
> Also you should follow me on wattpad if you haven’t already :) it’s just violetjosh, we can message on there n stuff.


	7. Chapter 7

Hands squeezing, water and now diluted alcohol drips from the used rag and into the sink, splashing against shot glasses that Ashley had set in there previously when she realized that Josh would just end up washing them for her.

Tonight's passing by slowly like all weekdays do, Josh isn't completely bored, he'd brought a bar stool behind the bar so he could sit down and watch the tv when he had nothing to do. Which he ends up doing for a good hour while tending the bar, Ashley's there too, hanging out with her boyfriend at one of the tables, laughing, grinning, not working. He doesn't exactly care, as long as she'd help him out of he needed her to. She usually does even if she doesn't particularly want to. 

Swinging his feet he jumps off the bar stool and rebuttons one of buttons of his dress shirt with warm fingers as he rounds over to the opposite side of the bar to wipe down the counter for the 4th time that night. 

He's about to go to the bathroom and tell Ashley to tend the bar when there's a tap on his shoulder. 

"One ice water, please." 

Josh freezes before turning to the sound of the familiar voice, he smiles at him. "So you don't drink?" 

Distastefully Tyler shakes his head, fingers picking at the sleeves of his jean jacket as he leans over the bar. "I'm not one for alcohol." 

Josh nods as he reaches for a glass underneath the bar and brings it to the light, inspecting it quickly to make sure it's actually clean. It is. 

Ice gets scooped into the glass, Josh using tap water to fill up the cup. He's talking as he works, eyes on anything but Tyler. "I can make you something non-alcoholic if you want, we've also got Capri suns in the back." 

Tyler's eyes light up while Josh pushes his glass of ice water across the bar. "Is a Capri sun too much to ask for?" 

With a shake of his head Josh says. "I'll be right back." 

There's a grin on his lips, cheeks faintly red as Josh leaves to grab two pouches of Capri sun. They're not very cold and no one ever asks for one so they have way too many in stock especially since the staff never touches them. He finds them beside a box of granola bars he usually eats during his breaks. 

When he comes back Tyler is spinning  around on the bar stool and with grace Josh tosses the juice at him, Tyler catching it with both hands and sticking his tongue out. 

"Thanks." He says, already tearing the straw from the packaging. Josh settles in-front of him, ribs digging into the edge of the bar uncomfortably. 

"So how ya feeling lately? How's your knee?" 

He stabs the straw in and stares at Tyler who hasn't stopped smiling. "I'm fine, it kinda aches so if it gets worse I'll go to the doctors but right now it's not half-bad." He sighs. "That knee brace thing is helping a lot."

Tyler nods in thought. "Should've went to the hospital right away, but Brendon's a dumbass." 

Josh shrugs. "It doesn't matter anymore really, I'm mostly healed." 

"Good, I'm glad because I kinda wanted to invite you over." 

Josh blinks, staring at him as he takes a long sip of his Capri Sun, slurping it slightly. Tyler looks at him like he's fragile, about to break, he continues and lets his fingers rest on Josh's wrist.

"And I kinda want to paint you." 

"Oh." 

Tyler takes a sip from his drink and tilts his head, hair getting in his eyes. He could use a haircut. "Yeah. If it makes you uncomfortable then you don't have to, you don't need to be nude either I just wanted to ask." 

"No, no." Josh shakes his head. "That wouldn't make me uncomfortable." 

Tyler raises an eyebrow, Josh smiles. "Seriously?" 

"Yeah, it's no big deal. You've already done a lot for me already, it's the least I could do." 

Tyler frowns. "Don't do this as a favour okay?  I don't want you to feel obligated to." 

"I don't feel obligated, if I didn't want too I would've said no, believe me." 

Tyler smiles and nods, chewing on his straw. "That's sick man." 

"Yeah, sick." 

Josh chews on his lip in thought, cheeks warm as he asks and even though Tyler had said he would have to be naked he needed to know. "I don't have to actually hook up with you guys do I?" 

Tyler grins, he giggles. "No, I was just gonna have you pose for me." He leans over the bar, ledge digging into his ribs, resting his hand over Josh's this time, his nails are painted yellow today. "Unless you want to hook up with us because we're good with that too." 

Cheeks pink, Josh stares at him for a second before his attention is drawn to an older man who'd just sat down on the opposite end of the bar. "Ah, one second." His smile is apologetic. 

Tyler waves him off, swings his legs. 

The man wants whiskey and Josh is quick behind the bar, grabbing a bottle, sliding in ice to his cup and then pouring with one hand. 

Tyler watches him as he squeezes every last drop of his capri sun into his system, sugary liquid on his tongue.

Josh's heart is pounding as he walks back over to Tyler, fingers combing through his hair nervously. It's been a while.

"Look, I do like you." He doesn't know why he feels the need to admit this, he feels like he's in high school all over again, but he's not and this is different, so different because Tyler is staring at him, a smile making its way onto his lips. "And Brendon too, but I- I- let me think about that?" 

Tyler doesn't seem offended, if anything he's sincere. "Hey, it's all about you. You're welcome with us anytime, promise we'll take good care of you." 

"Am I?" Josh asks.

"Yeah, so why don't you come over sometime this week, I'll paint you and then we can smoke a bit, nothings gotta happen." 

"Brendon will be there?" 

He shrugs, jacket slipping down his shoulders, his shirt is sheer, chest visible. "Probably, I'm guessing he'll want to see you." He reaches a hand across the bar, to accentuate his point. "We both like you, just so you know." And Josh wants to know in what way exactly, do they like him as friends? He bites his tongue. 

"I'll be there."

Tyler nods and then stares at Josh's unfinished Capri sun. "Can I have the rest of that?" 

Josh rolls his eyes and passes it to him just as a woman walks in, the blonde he'd seen the first time he'd seen Tyler. It's her he's sure and she's hanging off of some guy, all love struck. Josh watches as they move into one of the nicely cushioned booths. 

Tyler follows his gaze before raising a gentle eyebrow at Josh, he's already finished Josh's Capri sun and he's chewing on the straw, letting it hang out of his mouth. "Y'know you have a tiny bit of a staring problem." 

"Don't we all?" 

"How'd you get that girl to stop crying that one day?" 

"Oh, see there's your staring problem again." 

"I'm kidding." He says sweetly and turns to look at her, following Josh's eyes. "Oh, her." 

He shrugs in thought. "Boyfriend troubles, I told her she was beautiful, a model, brought her home, took care of her." 

Josh scoffs. "Thought as much." 

Tyler smiles. "I'll see you soon then?" 

"Yeah." 

*

At home Josh dreams of Brendon kissing him and Tyler touching him and he wakes up warm, sweating and nervous. It shouldn't be weird to him but it is. 

He thinks about them all morning, as he showers, suds running down his body, along with the rest of his hair dye seeping out and staining the bottom of the tub. It's a much more faded red now, he needs a re-dye. 

He think about them at the doctors as he gets aid with his testosterone dosage. 

And as he's home again in his pyjamas watching cake boss and cuddling with Oscar, he's thinking about them too and he can't not at this point. The two of them have been on his mind all day and Josh knows that as soon as he gets to work he'll still be thinking about them no matter how busy the bar is and he knows he'll be hoping that they'll show up because they somehow always do.

And really, he's perfectly fine with it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Give me feedback please. Sorry it’s so short btw, well it’s short compared to all the other chapters. Oops 
> 
> Stuffs finally happening :)))


	8. Chapter 8

 

 

Josh curls up on his couch, a knee to his chin while his other foot rests in Jon's lap. The smell of nail polish is high in the air as Jon swipes a coat of a light pink color across one of his toe nails.

"I've never done this before." Jon says quietly as he stares at the nail he's just painted.

Josh curls his toes, smiling. "You're doing great." And it's not a lie, Jon hasn't smeared any of the pretty varnish on his skin despite his application being shaky.

"Yeah, thanks dude." He grabs Josh's foot and inspects his job before setting it back in his lap. He sighs. "I still don't know why i'm the one doing this, you do have working hands."

"It always turns out better when someone else does it." Josh smiles and inspects his toes, stretching his legs out.

"Still, im sure you could've found someone better then me."

Josh just shrugs and he thinks of Tyler. He's sort of stealing his brand by painting his toes. "Sure, but you live right across from me."

Jon gently pushes Josh's feet out of his lap. "Hey, they're still drying!" Josh frowns and Jon stands up.

He rolls his eyes at Josh's protest. "I'm just getting a red bull, this is exhausting."

"I want one too." Josh grins.

Jon walks into the kitchen and Josh listens as he rummages around through his fridge. It's getting late, evident by the dark sky outside. Josh isn't even really that tired, he's having fun with Jon, his only actual friend besides Tyler and Brendon.

Tyler who hasn't texted him in a week. He hasn't even seen either of them at the bar and it makes him nervous. He misses them and to fill the void of not seeing the two men who've made his life so interesting over the past month, he's spending time with his best friend and having too much sex.

"Jon." Josh says after a moment, watching as Jon is comes back into view with two large cans of red bull, perspiration cooling down the sides.

"Yeah?" He says as he passes Josh his respectful can.

"I kind of like these two guys." Josh says, he smiles. It's nice to admit that he likes them out loud. It's a good reminder too, he doesn't bother mentioning that he hasn't seen them in far too long.

Jon nods, taking a sip of his red bull. "And you want to have sex with them?"

Josh rubs his forehead, his cheeks are pink. "No."

"No?" Josh raises his eyebrows. He knows Josh too well and there's no way he can hide the fact that if Tyler or Brendon initiated anything with him that he'd be dropping his pants in seconds.

"I mean, yes I do.. want that." Josh groans and leans back in the couch. "But I also want to date them." Jon gives him a weird look. "I want to date both of them and do all that stupid romantic shit."

"Okay." Jon hums, moving over to the kitchen and sitting on top of the counter. He swings his legs like a child. "Yeah, so what's the problem?"

"I don't know." Josh sighs, he has no idea. He pops open the tab of his red bull.

"Well if you brought it up, there's something bothering you with it."

"Just-" Josh looks at him. "How do you even date two people?"

"The same way you fuck them." Jon says. Josh knows this part, having more than one partner has become familiar to him. He knows how it goes, who to kiss, when to kiss, where to touch. Equal attention goes to everyone involved and Josh is good at it, he's generous and puts their needs before his. He likes it that way, he likes watching a girl cum from just his tongue, he likes watching a man cry out his name and he likes giving and giving and giving until there is nothing else for him to give.

Josh glares at him, there is nothing for him to say. Jon simply smiles and runs his fingers through his short hair. "You take care of them." He corrects. Josh knows, that's all he does.

"You really aren't helpful." He looks at his toes, looking at Jon right now is difficult. Talking about this is embarrassing.

"Just pursue it the way you would pursue a relationship involving just one person, man, you're making a big deal out of nothing."

Josh blinks and searches for his red bull, taking a long sip once he finds the cab sitting on the floor beside the couch. Jon is right, which isn't really surprising. "It just feels different with the two of them, they're like really cool."

Jon smiles. "Maybe it's because you actually like these two guys and don't want to date them just because the opportunity has arisen."

"I don't do that." Josh glares at him and then he thinks. He's initiated most of his relationships in the past year and that couldn't mean that he'd settled for the people he'd dated just because he knew they'd say yes. This meant nothing, he dated them because he liked them and that's all.

"Yeah, you do." Jon replies and Josh knows he's right again.

Josh just shakes his head and Jon snorts.

"Fine." Jon says, crossing his fingers together in his lap. "Let's say that you don't do that." He raises an eyebrow. "Maybe it's different because you really, really, desperately want to fuck them so badly that you'll cry if you don't."

Josh gapes. "Dude." Jon is laughing, a hearty laugh that makes Josh stands up, careful not to put too much pressure on his bad leg. "You're not funny. Like at all."

"And I am not that horny and i'm not desperate."

Jon swings his legs and gets off of the counter. "You definitely are, that's why we used to have sex."

Josh grimaces at the memory. Jon isn't wrong. He pulls Oscar into his lap as he passes by. Oscar meows in protest but he still allows it, curling up properly on top of him. "That was once." He pets along Oscars spine.

"Yeah, yeah, anyways." He sighs." Just have sex with them, i'm sure you'll figure shit out afterwards." Jon says, sitting on the couch. Putting his feet up on the coffee table.

"Sex doesn't solve everything." Josh kisses the top of Oscar's head and pets behind his ears like he knows he likes.

"It might solve this." Jon replies, tilting his head at him.

"It won't."

"If it doesn't you owe me like 20$."

"You're actually awful." Josh sighs. "It's such a bad idea."

Jon just smiles.

By the time Jon leaves, Josh is in fact; horny and desperate. Maybe sex will help, even though Josh guesses it most likely won't. Communication is more important then sex when you're going into a new relationship and he knows that.

*

Sunlight wakes Josh up in the morning and he's glad he has the day off, he'd given his shift away because god he was just not in the mood to work. He didn't want to get home late, exhausted, go to bed and do the same thing the very next day. It's not at all amazing.

Oscar and Bear are meowing at his door as he slips on some sweat pants. It makes Josh smile. The moment the door is open they both follow him to the kitchen, small paws patting against the floor.

He's had them for years and they are the clingiest cats he's ever had. He absolutely loves them.

He sits on the couch for a while until his addiction gets the better of him and he ends up in the kitchen making himself coffee. He pops two pieces of bread in the toaster too, it's a small breakfast but it's enough for him. He'll probably have a snack later.

Josh is just about to sit down when he hears his phone get a notification from across the room. With great reluctance he sets his mug and plate down on an end table and scurries over to his phone quickly checking his messages.

His heart is in his throat at the sight of Tyler's text. Apparently they haven't forgotten about him.

**_Tyler :) - hey josh, want to come over and hangout?_ **

It's innocent enough. He stares at it for a moment, of course he wants to go over and hang. And maybe have sex, just because Jon told him so, and Jon might be right. Plus Tyler offered, more than once and so did Brendon.

Compiling an answer takes him longer than he'd like to admit.

_**Josh- today?** _

The reply is instant.

_**Tyler :)- yes today,** _

Josh can do this, he bites the inside of his cheek as his thumbs work.

_**Josh- yea, sure** _

_**Josh- when??** _

_**Tyler- I was thinking for dinner** _

_**Josh- what are u making me ??** _

_**Tyler- nothing, I only cook for Brendon** _

_**Josh - :(** _

_**Tyler- ill order pizza if that's good with you** _

_**Josh- sounds good 2 me** _

There's a few minutes of silence before Josh glances at the fresh hair dye bottles standing on his kitchen counter.  He's finally ready for a change, red is boring. Even though he knows he'll most likely just ruin his hair more he'd still bought colour remover, bleach and too many colours. He keeps them in stock just in case.

_**Josh- also while I'm there do you guys think you could help me dye my hair?** _

_**Tyler- seriously?** _

_**Josh- yes...** _

_**Tyler- cool, we can definitely help you. Can't say I have much experience with hair dye though** _

_**Josh- well I'll be your experience** _

_**Tyler- sounds like some really good experience** _

_**Josh- is this how u flirt? Cause u kind of... suck** _

_**Tyler- no, you suck** _

_**Josh- I do :))))** _

_**Tyler: come over rn, I have something for you to suck on ;)** _

_**  
Josh- ... if this is what texting you is like, I don't want to know what it's like to text Brendon** _

_**Tyler- hey! Texting me is great. Calling me is better,** _

_**Josh- I bet it is** _

_**Josh- but you know what? Talking to u in person is the best** _

_**Tyler- aw thank you joshie** _

Evaluating what to say next takes a moment and he moves himself onto his couch as he replies.

_**Josh- hey do you think I could have Brendon's number?** _

_**Tyler- ooh good idea!! We should make a group chat** _

_**Josh- that is not what I meant.** _

Josh can't help but laugh, "Oh my god." He's never really been one for texting but he didn't really mind today. Oscar nestles into his lap as his phone rings with new messages.

_**Unknown number- heyyyy joshhh** _

_**Tyler- we can send all our nudes in here** _

_**Brendon- josh I am so sorry** _

_**Josh- I don't take nudes** _

_**Tyler- it's ok, I have enough of them to compensate** _

_**Brendon- have I seen them all?** _

_**Tyler- nope :)))))))** _

_**Brendon- are you in the living room?** _

_**Josh- you could idk go check** _

_**Brendon- I'm in bed, who gets out of bed before 10am** _

_**Tyler- me,** _

_**Josh- me** _

_**Brendon- Tyler's an awful boyfriend, his side of the bed is going to be replaced with a body pillow** _

Josh is feeling ballsy, he types.

_**Josh- I'll replace him** _

_**Tyler- uh hell no, there will be no replacing. Josh can be sandwiched between us both because I'll be in bed** _

_**Brendon- nah I'll be in the middle and I will spoon him** _

Josh is mad that he's sort of blushing over a bunch of text messages.

_**Josh- hypothetically?** _

_**Brendon- come over now and find out** _

_**Tyler- no, he's coming over later so we can dye his hair and other thingsss** _

_**Josh- this gc is going to kill me, I'll see you guys in a few hours.** _

*

In those few hours Josh learns he's awful at killing time. He's bored, too much anticipation and excitement to see Tyler and Brendon.

He's never liked two people at the same time. He's either had boyfriends or girlfriends, only one at a time. It scares him that he wants both Brendon and Tyler and it scares him that so far it seems like they both wanted him too. The situation is weird to him, the situation make him anxious and he's not sure why. All he know is he wants to kiss them both breathless.

And he knows rejection isn't something he needs to be worrying about, Tyler and Brendon have made it clear enough that they like him too. He likes that they're both very forward about what they want, it compensates for his lack of effort.

*

Tyler is the one who opens the door when Josh shows up at their place, a bag of dye and bleach in his hand. Tyler smiles at him and he looks really good and it makes Josh wonder how much effort he actually puts in his appearance, he's beautiful that's for sure.

There's no question about it.

Tyler says "Hey." and then he's hugging him on sight, he smells like lavender and paint and Josh smiles as he gets pulled into their apartment only to have Brendon hug him tightly as well. Opposed to Tyler he smells like weed and deodorant.

"You look good." Brendon says with a smile.

Whatever bruising he had is gone now, he hopes he looks good.

"Sounds fake to me but i'll take it." Josh says, stepping further into the apartment. Light shines in brightly from the large window in the living room. The sun is probably just setting.

"Nah you really do look cute, don't worry about it." Tyler smiles and flips Josh's hat around so it's backwards. "I'm gonna go order food, we were gonna do it earlier but we weren't sure when you were gonna get here."

"What kind of pizza do we want? Any requests?" Tyler asks, moving from one foot to the other, swaying. He wants to please, he wants everyone to be happy and it's adorable and Josh wants to kiss him to let him know that he appreciates it. He appreciates him so much.

Josh just shrugs instead of kissing him, it's not the time. "I basically like everything."

"Good to know." Brendon winks and leans into Josh, resting his hand on his waist and pulling him in close, hip to hip. Tyler just rolls his eyes and Josh blushes

"Ok cool.... i'll just order my favourite then." He pulls his phone out of the front pocket of his overalls. He looks at Brendon and points. "And you, you better not be fucking gross." Tyler turns around and starts dialling. Josh just smiles, it's so nice to see them again.

He smiles wider when he notices Brendon staring at the bag in his hands  "Oh shit, are we actually dyeing you hair for you?" Brendon asks in amazement, his glasses are pushed up into his hair, his myopia not as bad as Josh had once thought.

Josh shrugs and hands him the bag. "Yeah I uh- I don't have a lot of hair but I tend to fail pretty hard when I do this myself." He takes off his hat. "I always miss the back."

"Don't worry man, we will take care of you." Brendon is rummaging through the bag and he pulls out the bright pink hair dye first. He raises an eyebrow and then looks back at the dye. "This is gonna be hot."

"We should do a tiny strand in Tyler's hair." Brendon grins, waves the dye around like its a wand.

"Would he want to?"

Brendon shrugs. "Who knows? It'll be fun either way."

Josh rolls his eyes and listens to Tyler ordering the pizza in the living room, he think he hears meat lovers. "Are you gonna write about it?"

"Who knows?" Brendon says.

"You know, I do question if you actually write anything at all." Josh doesn't mean to sound rude but Brendon seems completely unbothered.

Because he just smiles. "I do, i'll show you sometime in the near future. If you'd like."

"Honestly that would be really cool."

"Sweet, you know Josh this whole night is going to be fucking amazing, we have so much planned-" Brendon cuts himself off and puts the dye back into the bag. It's awkward and weird and Josh doesn't know what to do. Brendon doesn't care, he pats Josh's shoulder, his fingers lingering. "I'm gonna go put this in the bathroom."

Josh furrows his eyebrows as Brendon walks away, he's odd and Josh was going to ask what he was going to say but he just sighs, there's no point.

He slides off his shoes and takes soft steps over to the living room, stretching his arms above his head as the scene in front of him comes into view.

Tyler is sitting on the couch with a small canvas sitting on his lap and a palette covered with paint on the couch cushions. It's surprising that the couch isn't completely covered in paint, there are barely any stains and Josh is impressed. For a messy artist, Tyler seems to keep the furniture clean. His clothes and the floor are a different story.

By the window near an easel there's what seems to be a puddle of dried blue paint on the floor. Josh thinks it adds character to the house and he can't remember a time where he's seen Tyler wearing something free of a paint stain. Maybe that's what happens when you're an artist, Josh wouldn't know.

Tyler doesn't notice him until he speaks and when he does he's quiet and unsure. It's hard to feel comfortable around a couple that is so comfortable with each other that boundaries don't even seem to exist. "Pizza ordered?"

Tyler looks up at him and smiles, like he'd been expecting him. Josh feels his cheeks heat up and he wants to hide, it's much more embarrassing to be blushing as an adult than it was when he was a teenager.

"Yeah dude." He moves the palette of paint over and into the coffee table. "Come sit with me, I want your opinion on this painting."

"Really? Are you sure? I know nothing about art." Josh removes his baseball cap.

Tyler waves him over. "Who cares, you don't need to be an artist to have an opinion. Get over here."

The reassurance and confirmation is all he needs before his feet move on their own accord, he's eager to see what's Tyler's been working on.

It's always interesting to see artists at work and Tyler won't be an exception. Josh sits at a good distance away from him, it's comfortable but Tyler just grins at him and scoots closer until their knees are fucking touching. He knows what he's doing and is completely shameless about it.

Josh hates him and Josh likes him again when he places a wet looking canvas in his lap.

He's expecting to see genitalia, maybe a nice cock or some woman's breasts. Probably outlined with soft colours and gentle brush strokes. Either or he would've been impressed and maybe he'd even buy one of them because who doesn't want a painting of a penis on their wall?

Surprisingly, Tyler hasn't painted another one of his hookups. There's no naked women or men, no stranger. He painted Josh and Josh's heart stops the moment he sees it.

"Holy shit." Josh smiles and stares at Tyler with wide eyes before looking back at the painting in shock. Tyler fucking painted him. "Y-you, wow, fuck, I don't even kn- This is so cool." Josh can't even taken his eyes off of it, can't get words out, it looks so much like him that he's speechless.

He's not smiling in the painting, he's just there without a shirt on. That's okay though, Tyler didn't forget his binder, he'd painted a sunset over it, dark purples blending in with soft oranges.

Josh could cry. No one has ever put this much effort into him.

Josh does cry, his eyes start to water, he wipes at them with the palms of his hands and sets the piece of art in his lap. "Fuck."

"Oh, did you show him?" Josh vaguely hears Brendon's voice but he doesn't see, he's staring at the painting of him. Tyler ignores Brendon and touches Josh's back, a gentle stroke. It's meant to soothe him and it does.

Tyler's grin falls for a moment when his face is close to Josh's and he can see his red teary eyes. "Josh, are you crying?"

Josh looks at him and he can't stop the tears that roll down his cheeks. "I- This is the nicest thing anyone has ever done for me in a long time." He's overwhelmed with emotions and he cries and cries and cries. They aren't sobs, but there are tears and sniffling noses and wet cheeks.

Tyler's smile is back and Josh thinks he's about to start crying too but he doesn't, he gently moves the painting out of Josh's lap before replacing it with himself.

Josh doesn't protest, he welcomes Tyler's person and lets Tyler sit in his lap, wrapping his arms around him in a tight hug. His movements are slow and careful, this is new, this is the most they've touched and Josh holds him and he cries. "You're so important to me Josh, do you understand that?" Tyler whispers, delicately pushing one of his stray curls behind his ear.

His head rests against the solid weight of  Tyler's chest as he nods. Although it's just the two of them, Brendon still joins in for the moment.

He whispers. "You're important to me too Josh." and It's important that it's said, Josh needs him too and he feels calmer at the feeling of Brendon pressing against him. Brendon touching him, Brendon being there and close.

Brendon's arms wrap around the two of them and he rests his forehead against Josh's, Tyler's chin rests near Josh's shoulder. They're all quiet, Tyler rubs his back and Brendon strokes through his hair Tyler.

"What're we doing?" Josh whispers under his breath, it's questioning, he's not confused but he needs confirmation. Tyler's heartbeat is constant against his ear, it calms him more then it should and Brendon shifts against him and squeezes them both tighter.

"I'm going to kiss him." Brendon says, a declaration, he whispers this into Josh's ear, his breath tickles and Josh is warm, too hot. "And you're going to watch and if you get uncomfortable you're going to tell us to stop." Josh already knows he won't tell them to stop. He nods and Brendon pulls away, the weight against his left side gone and the weight in his lap lighter as Tyler gets on his knees to better kiss Brendon.

"Josh, this is okay right?" Tyler's fingers squeeze his thigh. Josh nods.

"Yeah?" Brendon whispers, he's looking at Josh, his thumb is on Tyler's jaw, Josh nods again, he wants this, he wants to see them. The lighting is a single lamp and it's just enough to see them both perfectly. Josh encourages them, he touches Tyler's shoulder. "Yes." He whispers. "Yes,"

Tyler presses a hand to his thigh and licks his lips and Josh, he's red in the face when Brendon finally presses his lips to Tyler's, it's not gentle and Tyler gasps into his mouth the moment Brendon moves closer, knee to Josh's thigh, one hand on his shoulder for balance, the other strong and tight on Tyler's neck. Brendon licks into Tyler's mouth and holds him and kisses him hard and breathless. They're over his lap, pulling and tugging and kissing hard and fast and Josh is just a presence until he isn't.

He is a viewer until he isn't.

And Josh is no longer a viewer when Tyler pulls away from Brendon, lips red, cheeks pink and looks at him with a silent question. Josh looks to Brendon first, his smile is lazy. "Do it."

And Josh nods and although nervous, pulls Tyler in by the straps of his overalls, Tyler giggles as their lips press together in a smooth motion and Josh whimpers into his mouth, his back arches. It's good, so fucking good, everything's he's hoped for, Tyler's lips are soft, his mouth is hot and Tyler resumes his position in his lap, he straddles his lower body with little to no movement and pushes him back into the couch with his body weight as his hands comb into his hair.

Brendon is on him too, his hand finds his and he squeezes and his lips find his jaw, they travel along skin and soft stubble and then his cheek and his forehead like they've touched him before, like they belong. As far as Josh's concerned they do. Tyler holds his jaw as they kiss and Brendon moves to Tyler, his hands wander up and down his body, they squeeze at his waist and then his ass and Tyler squeaks into Josh's mouth.

Josh laughs, quiet, timid. It's natural and as a form of end, Tyler kisses the corner of his mouth and then his chin and Josh doesn't have time to ask questions before Tyler moves off of his lap and Brendon replaces him.

It happens fast, Brendon grabs his shoulders and leans in with heat and passion and Josh whines, pressing back against him with the same force. He kisses differently, rough, hard and Josh allows it and lays him down on the couch, Brendon's legs wrapping around his waist as he lowers them down, his arms on either side of his head.

A hand is in his hair, not Brendon's but Tyler's and it guides him with every kiss, Brendon licks his tongue and Tyler guides his lips to Brendon's mouth and then pulls, tugs, his head down to his neck. Josh's hands rest on his shoulders and his mouth kisses where it's led. 

"Josh." Tyler whispers, his face is pink, his neck the exact same color, he's kneeling beside the couch.

"Mhm?" Josh presses a final peck to Brendon's neck and allows Brendon to wrap his arms around his waist and hold him once more.

Brendon leans up, uses his elbows as leverage. He glares at Tyler. “You got to kiss him for like twice as long, you dick."

Tyler rolls his eyes and kisses Josh again, it's awkward, Josh is on top of Brendon, body completely vertical to his. Still Josh welcomes it, his body moulding to Tyler's as Tyler begins to climb on top of him. "Shit, we need to stop." He gasps and Josh kisses his neck, lips a gentle suction.

"Do we?" Josh asks, he thinks of Jon, he can't lose that 20$. Still his hands gras Tyler's hips as Brendon sits up and pulls himself out from underneath him to sit behind him instead.

Brendon brings Josh in to kiss him once he’s free from under him. “Don’t need to stop anything.”

"I-I, I think we should." Tyler says firmly, standing up, his legs wobble. Josh frowns, Tyler does too. "It's not that we don't want you, just. We should save this for later okay?"

Brendon wraps his arms around Josh's waist. "Fine, but i’m still going to cuddle him." He whispers, his neck shines with kisses.

"Yeah." Tyler grins and sits back down, crossing his legs. "For sure."

Josh leans into Brendon's touch and stretches his legs out until his toe touches Tyler's knee. "Do I like, not get a say in this?" Tyler pokes Josh's foot. “I wanna say something.”

"Say what you need to." Brendon yawns.

"Okay well. I, that was like really good. Definitely want to do that again." He smiles, timid as he speaks, he’s flushed pink and Tyler hasn’t looked away from him.

"Definitely still like you guys as much as I did before, probably even more but are we uh-dating? Because I don't think i'm okay with being just another one of your hookups."

Tyler frowns and crawls forward, sitting on his thigh. “Josh, we don't want anymore one night stands yeah? Just you."

it’s overwhelming and Josh’s brain hurts as he tries to process the information. “Really? You're sure about this?” He runs a hand through his hair as Brendon starts kissing down his neck again, it's distracting. Tyler smirks and nods. "So you-you want me to be apart of this?" Josh sighs in content.

"Dude, I think the answer is obvious." Brendon murmurs against his neck.

  
*

I CRIED WHILE I  
WROTE THIS AND I DONT KNOW WHY, IM JUST, SO EMOTIONAL AND I WAS PETTING MY BUNNY AND SHE WAS ADORABLE AND I WAS LISTENING TO BABY BY NICOLE AND ITS SO GOOD AND IM In SUCH A GOOD MOOD.

i have literally never been so excited about a chapter , i like thoroughly enjoyed writing this

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> HRHFGH I FEEL LIKE THIS IS A BIG MESS BUT I TRIED


	9. Chapter 9

 

  
Josh is happy, his legs are draped over Brendon's lap, Brendon's hand gently squeezing and unsqueezing his ankle, the gesture calming him. It's nice, the comfort he feels in his touch. Tyler is at the front door, collecting the pizza they'd ordered. Josh had offered to pay at the sound of knocking but Tyler had just kissed him softly and laughed before prancing away to get the food.

His lips are still sore from the amount of kissing he's participated in, in the past 30 minutes. Their relationship has done a complete 360 within that time frame and even with reassurance Josh feels slightly out of place. Tyler and Brendon have been dating for years, he's jealous of this, jealous that their so close, scared that this means he'll never fit in. So even with the comforting touches from Brendon he's still kind of intimidated by the whole situation.

And he voices these things when Brendon frowns at him, pulls him closer with a gentle tug and asks. "What's wrong?"

At first he denies anything and shakes his head before shutting his eyes. "Nothing."

"You're a shitty liar." Brendon snorts, scooting closer to him, Josh's thighs end up in his lap, Josh is blushing.

"Is it weird to talk about your relationship with the person you're in a relationship with?" Josh asks, letting his fingers wander into Brendon's hair so he doesn't have to make eye contact. Frankly, he's surprised that Brendon doesn't ask him to stop considering Josh has ruined his hair at this point.

Brendon raises an eyebrow. "Uh- that's a big _no_ , you're actually _supposed_ to talk to the people youre dating when it comes to the relationship."

Josh groans, pouting. "I'm bad at that."'

Brendon frowns. "Do you not want this or something?"

" _No_ \- No I do want this. I want to be with you and Tyler." Josh smiles shakily, lacing his fingers with Brendon's and giving them a tight squeeze. "That's definitely not the problem, i'm just scared I guess." He looks at Brendon softly. "This is new to me and you guys have been dating for a long time and I don't feel like i'm intruding but I sort of do at the same time. I want this to work, I really want it to work. But i'm like a new addition to this relationship and I don't want to be a burden or ruin things." Josh exhales and looks at Brendon. "Sorry, uh- I guess I needed to get that off my chest."

"You're overthinking this way too much." Brendon kisses his knuckles one by one. "Don't think about it like that, me and Tyler might be going on our fourth year together but that doesn't make our dynamic of this relationship superior. We're excited to have you be apart of this and you're definitely not intruding." Josh sighs in relief and presses himself to Brendon's chest, Brendon still continues. "We really like you Josh. Everything will work itself out naturally just do and say what feels right you know?"

Josh nods against his chest just as Tyler wanders back in, two pizza boxes in hand.

"Why does Josh look like he's about to cry again? Did you show him that other painting I did of him?" Tyler scolds, setting the boxes of pizza on the coffee table along with their drinks.

Brendon snorts at the way Josh's cheeks flush and he wiggles closer to him. "I mean why don't you ask him?" Brendon’s lips go to Josh's ear, whispering softly. "He'll probably say the same thing i did."

Josh looks at Tyler and asks him. "I just, I guess im worried that i'm not gonna fit in with you two." Josh admits shyly, it's not easy to be this vulnerable for him but he decides that if this is going to work it's necessary.

Tyler smiles, settling beside them, managing to wiggle his arm around Josh's waist and pull him closer; away from Brendon. "You already do Joshie."

Josh snorts, he can't even help it. "Gross, do not call me Joshie. I'll call you Tylie and i'll call Brendon, Brendie."

"Brendie, now that's hot." Brendon grins, scooting unbelievably closer to him.  Josh immediately finds himself leaning into him instead of Tyler. It's easy and even though he feels really squished between the two of them, he never wants to move.

"Hm, okay I think I know what might reassure you a bit I guess..." Tyler says in thought, running his fingers across Josh's thigh delicately.

Josh tenses slightly, Tyler laughs. "Relax." He squeezes his thigh instead and moves it lower towards his knee. "I was thinking more along the lines of a story about my past relationships, unless that would like bother you or something." Tyler looks at him then, eyes soft, cheeks flushed.

"If you want to." Josh says, glad that there's no awkward pauses when Tyler smiles at him and starts talking.

"So, well my first relationship ever was with my 2 best friends at the time." He says, there's nothing uncomfortable about it though. Just by his posture and tone Josh can tell that Tyler is comfortable talking about this. Even Brendon doesn't seem particularly bothered that Tyler's talking about his exes, his chin is just resting on Josh's shoulder. "Which, is as messy as it sounds. If you want an example of a bad poly relationship that was it."

"Brendon likes to argue that his first relationship was worse."

Brendon breathes against Josh's neck, it sends shivers down his spine. "Mhm, definitely was but i'm not gonna try an invalidate my baby's experiences."

Tyler rolls his eyes. "Oh sure, as if you don't do that already."

Josh has a lot of questions and he's just now realizing that he hasn't really seen Brendon and Tyler interact a lot until today but for some reason that just excites him, he's excited to learn everything about the two of them.

Tyler smiles at him. "Anyways, I dated my two best friends who were already dating each other first. Which shouldn't have been a problem y'know? but it was because they were both very jealous people which is ultimately bad especially for poly relationships. Because really, it's important that you don't get jealous. Like when you're here with Brendon, i'm not jealous that you two are spending time together. If anything i'm happy about it."

"Yeah." Brendon touches Josh's waist. "Neither of us are jealous, even in bed."

Josh blushes. Tyler snorts.

"So I told them I wasn't going to be monogamous and they said it was fine as long as i always came back to them. Which I did. Regardless they cared a lot more then they let on and wouldn't let me leave our apartment."

"What do you mean by that?" Josh frowns, tilting his head to the side when Brendon presses a kiss right under his ear and then his jaw. Tyler doesn't seem to care, his hand still possessively holding onto Josh's thigh as he speaks.

Tyler shrugs. "I mean they locked me in our bedroom for like 2 days after I told them I was going out to see my girlfriend."

Josh's eyes widen. "What the fuck."

"Yeah, what the fuck is right." Tyler is still smiling somehow though, always able to keep a smile on his face. "So that was shit."

"Then after I got out of that horror show, I met Brendie." Tyler leans over and presses a kiss to his lips, gripping Josh's thigh to keep him steady as he leans over. Josh bites his lip, an attempt to maintain his very calm exterior.

"We met at work actually, isn't that surprising." Brendon mumbles against Josh's neck once Tyler pulls away from him and settles back to his previous position, his hand straying to Josh's hip, which makes Josh takes a deep breath.

"Hm, yeah. I really was expecting you two to have met at a bar."

"If it tells you anything, our first time together was at a bar in a bathroom stall." Brendon chuckles.

"Which bar?"

"Ha, um. The one you work at." Tyler looks at Brendon.

Josh gapes. "Wait what?"

"4 years ago, give or take." Tyler smiles and gives Josh's thigh a squeeze. "Were you even working there?"

Josh has only been there for maybe 2 years now, he doesn't necessarily keep track of how long he works his jobs but it definitely hasn't been 4 years. "I-yeah i wasn't."

"We're getting off track again."

"Anyways lets just shorten this up, im really hungry." Tyler says, hooking his ankle with Josh's. "Long story short, I met brendon and his girlfriend, i was scared that i wouldn't fit in to their relationship, but turns out i did. And listen Josh, we wouldn't want to be in a relationship with you if we didn't think it would work okay? You fit in so well, I don't think we've even had a really awkward moment yet."

"You both made me feel very awkward at first." Josh admits a bit shyly, Tyler kind of frowns at him so he reaches for his hand to reassure him. "Maybe not awkward but confused, very confused."

Josh expects Brendon to say something, but he's still kissing up and down his neck, not hard enough to leave hickeys but enough to make him shiver. So he turns to Tyler since Brendon isn't participating in the conversation anymore, Josh isn't sure he'll be able to stay focused enough to participate either for very much longer.

Tyler nods in understanding. "That's fair, I mean i'm kind of a blunt person so people usually feel awkward around me."

"It's not a bad type of awkward or anything though." Josh assures him. "Just- i'm not the best at relationships in general and the way you were coming onto me-"

"Oh I wish." Brendon nips at his skin.

Josh yelps. "Oh my god!" and turns to him. "Brendon."

Brendon smiles. "What's up?"

"Ignore him," Tyler says automatically.

Josh sighs and looks at Brendon, glasses pushed into his hair, cheeks pink. Josh kind of wants to kiss his neck too now, just to make it fair but instead he smiles and turns back to look at Tyler with an easy smile. "Get back to the story?"

"Okay yeah." He narrows his eyes at Brendon. "So, finally all three of us dated, Brendon and I were the monogamous ones. Which surprised me but like-i was so helplessly in love with him that i didn't want other partners beyond him and sarah."

"I agree with that." Brendon says against Josh's skin, already moved back to his previous position. "He was soooo in love with me, still is."

Tyler blushes. "Yeah......So sarah left us. We just lost that connection with her, she comes around to hang out with us sometimes though. Once a year maybe, so after her, Brendon and I sorta stayed together and yeah, that's sort of it."

Josh is nodding and he gasps when Brendon licks over his pulse point. Clearly unable to stop himself. "D-Dude."

"Okay, time for food." Tyler pushes Brendon's head away from Josh's neck. "Behave yourself Brennie."

"Of course," Brendon perks up and pulls Josh right into his lap, forcing Tyler to let go of him. "i'm very well behaved. Don't you agree Josh?" He nuzzles into the soft skin of his neck, Josh curls his hand around Brendon's bicep.

Josh looks at him, cheeks a rosy pink. "Um, no. That's a big no."

"Ha!" Tyler yells once he's stood up.

"Oh shut up," Brendon rolls his eyes and cuddles up to Josh again, he holds him tightly and Josh can feel his binder digging into his ribs in the most obnoxious way. He'll need to take it off at some point tonight.

"So pizza time?" Tyler asks, sitting on the floor in front of the coffee table while already pushing open the lid of one of the pizza boxes. Josh breathes in, he hadn't realized how hungry he was until now.

"Yes, please." He says.

Tyler smiles and heads to the kitchen, Josh assumes it's to get paper plates or drinks. He's not sure, meanwhile Brendon is still holding him and Josh is still surprisingly really comfortable with him.

"Did that story help at all?" Brendon asks him, whispering into his ear. It makes Josh laugh because it tickles but ultimately he just smiles and nods against Brendon's chest.

Tyler comes back with paper plates, a few cans of red bull and ranch dressing.

  
*

After they eat, they all relocate to the bathroom.

Josh sits on the closed lid of their toilet, facing the wall. And much like last time he was here, he's not wearing a shirt. His binder remains intact though, tight around his ribs and body. It's not that uncomfortable still. When he showers to rinse out the bleach he'll definitely be taking it off for the rest of the night.

It was his idea, Brendon had immediately offered him some of his old clothes but Josh figured it was pointless. He's comfortable around them, so comfortable and he figures why take steps back when he's perfectly fine with baring his covered chest.

Tyler had also offered him his clothes, he'd said. "You'd look cute wearing one of my shirts." Josh had a sneaking suspicion that Tyler just wanted him out of his binder, he knew how bad Josh's ribs looked at the end of the day.

Currently, Tyler has gloves on and is reading the instructions about how to apply and mix the bleach and Brendon is sitting on the counter smoking. He'd asked Josh before hand of course and Josh hadn't really cared.

"I honestly do like the red a lot." Brendon says. Eyes on Tyler preparing the dye with Josh's careful instruction because really Josh doesnt trust the box dyes instruction.

"The red looks like shit, right now anyways." Josh turns to him, shivering when he feels Tyler's hand warm at the nape of his neck. "My roots are completely grown out, it's bad."

Tyler snorts from behind him, he's got the bleach ready to be applied, hands already hidden underneath gloves. "It looked good when I first saw you."

"Oh, I agree." Brendon swings his legs, like a child from where he's sitting on the bathroom counter.

Josh flushes slightly, groaning. "You're both lying, shut up."

"Nah, Josh you were so cute back there, no shit."

"I saw him first." Tyler murmurs, too concentrated on not messing up. His fingers are just carding through Josh's hair, parting it in a way that'll make the process faster and less messy. Bleaching hair isn't the easiest process, especially for a beginner. 

Grinning Josh turns his head back to look at Tyler and then to Brendon. "I dare you guys to tell me what your agenda was." Brendon grimaces.

Josh sighs. "And don't even try and tell me you didn't have one, so fucking cryptic all the time I swear."

"It's embarrassing." Brendon says, cheeks a shade of pink.

Josh blinks. "You're kidding, I really doubt it."

"Oh no, it's uh- kind of um, very elaborate." Brendon says awkwardly.

"We were very determined to find a way to get with you." Tyler adds on, unbothered unlike Brendon.

"Now you have to tell me."

"Wait Josh am I doing this right?" Tyler asks, the bleach formula on at the tips of his gloves and on the small brush in his hand. "Just your roots right?"

"Yeah you can kinda just put it everywhere honestly, just make sure you don't miss anywhere." He knows it's already going to turn out better then how he usually does it. Having any help at all usually makes it look a lot better then when he does it himself.

"Do you really want to know?" Brendon asks, not looking at him but at Tyler. Waiting for him to say it's not okay. Josh is definitely not going to let them get out of telling him.

"Yes." Josh murmurs.

"Okay so, Tyler is it like okay that I-"

"Yeah you tell it, you deserve the embarrassment."

Brendon snorts before carefully looking at Josh. "Okay look, please don't be mad firstly. Um, it's going to sound like we thought of you as an object and not a person which is shitty so you have every right to be offended."

"It's really not that awful, jesus you're bad at this baby." Tyler giggles, gently applying the bleach to Josh's hair.

"Shut up." Brendon rolls his eyes. "So, um it was all planned out. Mostly, the times you ran into Tyler selling his art wasn't and you coming here after you know-getting beat up- that wasn't planned but we kind of had this plan about how we'd ask you out and yeah....."

"What do you mean by planned out?" Josh flushes, unsure if he should be flattered or not.

"We saw you at the bar like a week before you noticed either of us and and we wanted to bring you home with us immediately." Brendon rushes out, not looking at Josh.   
"And we didn't tell you we were dating until later because we didn't want to freak you out since we were both sort of coming into you."

"So your plan was to do what?"

"Seduce you and then y'know bring you home........... and Tyler really wanted to paint you because he thinks you're really hot."

"Is that it?" Josh asks, wincing at the way the bleach is making his scalp burn. Despite having been expecting it and despite having bleached his hair many many times he's not sure he'll ever get used to the pain that comes with it. Tylers doing a really good job though, he can feel him working section by section, holding parts of his hair against his gloved hand and then saturating it with the bleach.

"I mean, we were also kind of competing to see who would kiss you first or who'd would manage to get you into bed but I guess yeah that's it." Brendon scratches at his hair before ruffling it a little. He pointedly looks at Josh, bottom lip caught between his teeth as he slowly gets off of the bathroom counter. "Are you upset?"

Josh frowns, shivering when Tyler scratches at his scalp just right. "Should I be upset?" He asks, mostly because it sounds like something that would upset most people. But he's not, he finds it sort of cute for some reason. "Because I don't think you did anything necessarily wrong and i'm like not mad about it."

"Mhm I guess not, unless you're offended that we only wanted to have sex with you at first." Tyler murmurs and Josh sighs when Tyler's gloved hands are no longer touching his head.

"Do you still just want to have sex with me?" He knows they don't just want sex, but it's still a thought. He doesn't think he would mind but still, he does like them both way more than he thought he would.

"Well.......yes, but we don't just want to have sex with you." Tyler says, a blush high on his cheeks. Which kind of surprises Josh, he turns around to face Tyler completely so he's no longer staring at a wall but at Tyler and Brendon instead. "We want you to be our boyfriend and we want to bring you on dates and we want to hang out with you and all that stuff."

"We want to do all the boyfriend stuff with you." Brendon clarifies.

Josh crosses his arms over his chest awkwardly. "We can do that." He gulps. "I-um, want to do all of that too."

Brendon smiles at him and Tyler pats him on the head. "Oh your hair is done by the way." Tyler smiles and peels off the gloves, throwing them into the small garbage can beside the toilet. Joshs scalp feels hot but it's tolerable, he's excited to rinse it out later.

"Cool. um well now we've just got to wait." He says and slowly stands, using Tyler's arm to pull himself up. Tyler's bicep is much stronger than it looks.

"Want to help me paint?" Tyler asks, cleaning up the counter space a little bit so it's more organized. There's still a lot to be done.

Josh frowns a bit, unsure about actually helping Tyler an actual artist with his art. There's no way this could genuinely end well.   "Oh, I, wouldn't wanna ruin anything."

Brendon's leaning in the doorway when he says. "Well you guys can hang out, i'm gonna bake a cake." It's extremely random and Josh and Tyler both turn to look at him.

Tyler raises an eyebrow. "You're going to bake a cake...."

"You can bake?" Josh asks, equally as surprised.

Brendon grins and shoves his hands into the pockets of his sweater. "Yeah, look I want something sweet and Tyler," He looks at him fondly. "You're a shitty baker."

"Okay, uh,well you do that honey," Tyler grins and kisses his cheek. "i'm gonna show Josh my art studio."

Brendon wanders off to the kitchen and Josh lets Tyler guide him to the art studio. Immediately Tyler reaches for his hand as he guides him along, which makes Josh smile and he's kind of realizing that Tyler's doing his own version of a house tour, despite them having an apartment that doesn't really require much of a tour.

It's big though, way bigger than josh's place. Tyler had pointed into a room as they passed by it. "This is our bedroom." He'd said and then the next few words out of his mouth were "Hallway closet, guest bedroom, and....... art studio." Which was a room at the end of the main hallway. He pushes the door open and if Josh thought the living room was messy then he'd surely underestimated how messy this room was going to be. Somehow he'd expected it to be clean.

It's not clean, at all. There are fresh canvases sacked in the corner of the room, some standing, some flat and then a bunch of paintings against the other wall, some Josh has seen before. There are jars of acrylic paint on a bookshelf, medium sized along with some oil paint solvant and fuck, theres a lot going on. The wooden floors have specks of paint all over them and the walls have actual paintings on them, Josh would consider them murals. It's so pretty and actually kind of cramped in here.

Tyler pulls him inside and Josh just kind of stares at everything in awe, mostly because it's difficult not to. "So this is where I spend a lot of my time." Tyler smiles and squeezes his hand. "It's kind of.... small but i think it works, i don't need that much space."

Josh nods. "This is really cool man." Josh gestures to the walls, the murals.

"Thank you!" Tyler lets go of his hand and Josh would've been offended had he not let go of his hand just to go grab a tiny canvas that's set on the desk.

The painting Tyler lets him help with isn't actual the tiny one though. He ends up leading him over to this huge canvas with a very abstract looking flower and says. "All I need you to do is is help with the background." And he hands him a medium sized paint brush. "I'll show you what I need you to do first and you can like, follow my lead I guess. Don't worry too much about it, it's an oil painting so every little mistake can be covered up really easily."

Before they start, Josh sets a timer on his phone for his hair. It won't need to be in for long, just enough to lift his roots to a light yellow-blonde colour. Which he hopes it'll do, he really doesn't want to bleach it twice considering how bad it is for his hair. Seriously, his hair feels extremely dry half the time and he knows it's because of the amount he bleaches it.

Tyler demonstrates, they're using white paint and all he does is dip in his paint brush and do a quick, kind of messy, stroke downwards.  And then he does a few more, some longer than others, some shorter. It kind of reminds Josh of rain drops rolling down a window.

"Okay so thats kind of it, you try now." Tyler says.

"I'm sorry if I ruin it." He says in advance and Tyler immediately smiles and assures him that he won't. Josh does exactly what Tyler had done. Dips his paintbrush in the paint, and then creates a medium length stroke downwards, ending it right before it touches the petal of the flower.

Josh looks at him nervously and Tyler grins. "That's actually perfect."

They get kind of carried away, really the canvas is so big and there's a lot of ground to cover. It could take an hour to fully cover the whole background like Tyler wants. They've done about half of it by the time Josh's alarm goes off.

"We're both covered in paint now." Tyler says, which Josh's furrows his eyebrows at before he looks down at his hands and arms and realizes that yeah he really is.

Josh smiles at him. "It's kinda hot."

"Hm, m' not sure if that's considered a paint fetish or a paint kink." Tyler grins and gently grabs Josh's paintbrush from his hand.

"Oh shut up."

*

Brendon and Tyler leave him to rinse out the bleach, which Josh is super careful about. it's kind of nerve wracking considering it would suck to get the dye solution in his eyes or anywhere that would cause him discomfort, especially knowing that he'd start crying. Which he doesn't want to happen because really, he's cried enough today.

It's an odd feeling to be in their shower though, knowing that both of his boyfriends? are right outside waiting for him. It's different from last time, last time had been about taking care of him because he'd been injured, this time was about taking care of each-other.

Well, Brendon and Tyler are still taking care of him, which Josh doesn't mind. He just wished he could be doing more for them, but maybe next time they come over to his house he'll feel better about it. He'll feel like he's taking care of them instead of the other way around.

When he's sure all the bleach is out he turns off the shower and goes to grab a towel to realize that there isn't one. Fuck. Josh sighs, looking down at his body that's already beginning to become covered in goose bumps from the cool air of the rest of the bathroom touching his skin.

"Uh-I need a towel." Josh yells, dripping with water. He pushes his hair back and he knows that he should probably tone it so it's less yellow, he knows his roots are definitely not the perfect bleached shade that the rest of his hair is but he just wants to get the pink dye in his hair and be over with it.

The door creaks open and Josh uses the shower curtain to hide his body before poking his head out. Its Tyler, with a huge fluffy yellow towel.

"Sorry we didn't leave you with one." He says and closes the bathroom door behind him. Josh can see the steam escape.

"It's fine." He reaches for the towel which Tyler easily gives to him. He doesn't immediately wrap it around himself though, he just holds it and keeps his head poked out so he can talk to Tyler.

"D'you want pyjamas?" Tyler asks.

"Am I sleeping here?" Josh raises an eyebrow, tries to not show how much he actually wants to sleep here. He's just nervous about what that would actually entail.

Tyler shrugs, Josh can tell that it's stunted, he wants him to sleepover. "Are you?" Tyler asks. "Because we'd love if you would."

Josh quickly pulls back behind the curtain and wraps the towel around himself in a tight hold. "Yeah, um id like that." He says quickly, quietly. It's kind of embarrassing and he's kind of freaking out because he's naked.

He hears Tyler hum. "Okay man, cool. I'll bring you some PJ's and then we can finish with your hair."

Tyler ends up giving him an old t-shirt and some basketball shorts. Josh is tempted to put his binder back on but it's pointless because he'll just need to take it off again when he rinses the pink dye out of his hair.

In the same position as before, Brendon actually ends up dyeing the rest of his hair, something about wanting to try it. And Tyler calmly sits on the bathroom counter, just like Brendon had been doing when they'd bleached his hair but he's not antsy, he's super concentrated.

He has his tiny painting with him and is way too focused to even look at them. Not that Josh minds, he's kind of falling asleep from the way Brendon has decided to massage his scalp with the dye. Which isn't really the nest way to apply it, because his scalp will be bright pink for a few days now but it feels way too good to ask Brendon to stop.

But anyways, Tyler's concentrated, which really is sort of cute, his tongue pokes out a little bit and he's sort of frowning but more in concentration then annoyance. And every few minutes he'll ask them both for their opinion and if the sky is too blue, and if he should add in more purple and pinks. He doesn't show them the painting though but somehow Brendon just answers without thinking. "Purple." every time Tyler asks.

It takes less time to get the dye in his hair, probably because Brendon isn't being as careful as Tyler had been with the bleaching but still, the dye is in his hair within 10 minutes.

"It looks good already." Tyler smiles and puts his paintbrush on the counter, not even bothered by the paint that drips onto it. He hops down.

"Yeah another 30 minutes and then I can rinse it out." Josh yawns. It's getting late and he's been here for hours at this point and already, he never wants to leave.

"Okay, well i'm taking a quick-shower, im covered in paint. Why don't you guys go like pick out a movie to watch?"

Brendon peels off the now pink gloves he's wearing. "Yeah sure."

  
*

While Tyler's in the shower scrubbing paint and hair dye off his body, Brendon and Josh head back to the living room with the promise of finding a movie and not starting it. It's dark outside and the only light they have is a small yellow toned lamp that's sat beside the couch.

Brendon gives Josh the remote control, letting him scroll through their options on netflix while he softly touches Josh's neck and shoulders. Nothing intense, just tracing the freckles that dust his skin. Which is as blushed as the rest of him is, Brendon hasn't stopped touching him all night and Josh loves it.

"So were watching captain america?" Brendon asks, kissing up Josh's shoulder.

Josh shrugs, shivering, he doesn't really care that much. "I guess so."

"Can I kiss you?"

Josh grins and sits up a little bit, touching his hand to Brendon's shoulder. "I guess so."

He ends up in Brendon's lap, straddling him shyly. It's different like this, without Tyler here. He wishes Tyler were here, just to watch, just to know that he really is okay with this.

"Bad idea, very bad idea." Josh whispers against Brendon's lips, hands on his shoulders, Brendon's hands cradling his cheeks, his jaw. He can feel some excess hair dye dripping down the back of his neck and down his back. He'd forgotten about the dye covering his entire head.

Brendon shakes his head and kisses him again, gentle, so gentle. His eyes are dark when he looks at Josh again. "Why?"

Josh rolls his eyes and diverts them to the wall behind them. There's a painting of a sunset he hadn't noticed earlier. "There's dye in my hair idiot." He whispers and looks at him again.

Brendon just shrugs. "I won't touch it then." And Josh is ready to protest again when Brendon kisses him and he gasps into his mouth, immediately squeezing his legs a bit. It's not that Brendon kissing him is unexpected, no, but the tongue that's introduced and the gentle nibbling at his lip instead of just soft chaste kisses is. It's like their first kiss but better, more comfortable, Josh is more at ease now, less worried about fucking up or crashing their teeth together.

He licks at Brendon's bottom lip and deepens the kiss, which Brendon allows and presses back against him. Pulling him against his chest by his waist. Considering his binders off, he's kind of uncomfortable. Very conscious of the small weight of his chest, he's not flat and that much is obvious when he's pressed to Brendon like this.

Ignoring the feeling is easy though, losing himself in the kiss is easy. It's so easy and when Brendon arches his back a little and cants his hips upwards Josh has to hold back a tiny moan in favour of spreading his legs a little more.

He's heat, hot all over his body. Brendon doesn't buck up against him again, which is mildly disappointing but he doesn't stop kissing him or running his fingers up and down his back which makes up for it. And when his hands up end up on Josh's thighs, gripping them nicely, Josh whimpers into the kiss.

Which Brendon seems to like by the way he holds onto Josh's hips and slowly grinds up against him. It's really slow at first, which Josh appreciates. The drag of their hips against one another is good, makes him squeeze his thighs a little harder and lose his focus a lot more then he'd like.

Even with the layers of clothes between them it feels good, and it feels better when Brendon's fingers draw at the waistband of his pyjama pants and start pulling them down. Frantically Josh lifts his hips up and helps Brendon pull his pants down to his knees, not bothering to completely remove them before sitting back down on his lap.

It's different with one less layer, his underwear are wet and his whole body trembles just a little bit when his clit gets stimulated by the way Brendon knocks his hips upwards, the hardness of his cock making contact with Josh. "Oh, _shit_."

And Brendon smiles. "Yeah? you're okay with this?" and Josh whispers yes and kisses him again, and starts squirming in his lap as he tries to get himself off. Which Brendon seems to like and follows along with, pushing his hips up to meet the steady grind of Josh’s.

Josh is so caught up in everything, so close, he barely even heard the quiet. “Woah." It's just a small voice but it’s not coming from him or Brendon. Brendon is still kissing at his neck and steadily grinding against him though so Josh glances behind him. Tyler.

" _Oh_." Josh gasps and squeezes Brendon's shoulders, lifting his hips off of his lap immediately, no matter how close he was. He can feel his thighs trembling and his face go red. "I-um." He looks at Brendon and then at Tyler. Not really sure what to do in this situation.

Tyler narrows his eyes at the two of them suspiciously. It's intimidating but Josh doesn't look away. "I thought you were gonna pick out a movie."

"We did." Brendon says before placing his hands on Josh's hips and gently pushing him back down, Josh squirms when that familiar hard pressure pushes up against him. Oh god he needs to get up.

"His neck is like completely pink, dye is everywhere." Tyler mumbles and walks over to them, placing a delicate hand on Josh's shoulder. It’s like he’s in trouble even though Josh can tell that Tyler’s not actually mad. 

Josh shakily climbs out of Brendon's lap, still coming down from what was almost an orgasm, Brendon grins at him. "Oops." He helps Josh pull his pants back up and pats him on the hip before leaning back into the couch. Josh isn't sure if he's annoyed that he didn't get to come or relieved.

”Dude,” Tyler sighs and touches his neck, he shows Josh his finger.  That’s a lot of dye. “C’mon,”

He ends up silently following Tyler to the bathroom, Tyler who's not smiling but just kind of neutral. Which worries him because Tylers always smiling, always playful. He's still aroused and he knows that a few fingers or just a little bit of pressure would get him off in under a minute but he's too focused on Tyler being mad that he doesn't even think about it.

"That was okay right?" Josh asks nervously once they shut the door behind them. "I feel like that wasn't something we've talked about and maybe should." Which it is, with all the talk of sex, they've never genuinely talked about it. He can feel the hair dye on his neck dripping down to his back. They should’ve covered his head with something. 

Tyler looks at him and adjust the towel around his waist. "Yeah, it's just um." Tyler grabs his hand and gently intertwines their fingers together, it's reassuring. "Okay this is going to sound stupid but i'm worried that once we start having sex we won't be able to stop and it'll become the whole relationship."

Josh gulps, yeah he understands that. Considering it seems like most of his relationships in the past year haven't been actual relationships and instead just a bunch of threesomes with strangers. "I-um, get that." Josh says quietly, leaning against the counter. "That makes sense, but look, we're not going to lose the whole connection we have if we start having sex y'know? It's just like an added bonus to our relationship, more intimacy. And look, we've made it this far already. And all we've done is kiss, we've spent more time just hanging out then anything else."

Tyler looks at their joint hands, eyes soft. "Yeah, you're right." It's weird to see one of the most confident people he knows be so vulnerable around him, but maybe it's because Tyler really isn't that confident. It kind of breaks Josh's heart a bit that this is a genuine worry of Tylers. Because he would never let their relationship solely become sex.

"Mhm, but look." Josh pauses. "If you really would be more comfortable with waiting, that's perfectly fine." Josh says, trying to be as comforting as possible. He genuinely hopes he's helping. "Have you talked to Brendon about this?"

"No." Tyler sighs, defeated. He slumps over a bit. "Like I know I probably should but I uh, honestly I don't know why I didn't."

"Okay well how about, we don't do anything tonight and you go talk to Brendon about it while I get this shit out of my hair." Josh says, his hair is becoming hard. Genuinely hard from how long the dye has been in there now.

Tyler nods and touches his hips, gently pulling him forward. Tyler kisses Josh and Josh immediately kisses him back. Tries to make it slow and soft and chaste, his hands gently holding Tyler's jaw, his body not too close. They pull away smiling.

"Go talk to him, i'll be out in like 10 minutes." Probably more because there's no way Josh is going to survive the rest of the night if he doesn't masturbate.

Tyler grins. "Yeah, I'll talk to him and when you get out we can actually watch a movie and eat the cake Brendon made."

*

Josh does end up masturbating in the shower, very quickly and very clumsily. It doesn't take very much to get him off, especially after grinding against Brendon for 10 minutes straight beforehand.

And then he's back in the pyjamas, hair wet, eyes tired and very ready to just cuddle up on the couch and watch captain america with his boyfriends. Well he thinks that's what he should be calling them anyways. They hadn't necessarily established much of a label for what they were but the world boyfriend had been mentioned multiple times today so he figures that's what they are.

Tyler has his head against Brendon's shoulder and legs in his lap while Brendon eats cake, presumably the one he made earlier.

"Looks cozy over there." Josh says with a little yawn as he approaches them. Theres a whole cake on the coffee table, with no frosting. Which Josh thinks makes it even better.

Brendon grins at him and takes another big bite of cake. "Join the cuddles."

Tyler pats the spot beside him and Josh blushes and climbs onto the couch, immediately wrapping his arms around Tyler. It's comfortable and Tyler lets Josh sort of half spoon him, half hold him from behind. "Good shower?" Tyler asks lazily, bringing Josh's hand to rest on his waist. Which Josh does with no hesitation.

Josh looks away and at the TV when he answers. "Great shower. I'm officially pink."

Brendon smiles. "I bet."

"Ew." Josh grimaces, he shoves him gently. "Whatever man, pass me some cake."

Which Brendon does. They all end up wrapped up around each other, which made Josh sweat a little because it's genuinely hot when you're three people all sharing body heat and creating more by how close you are to each other. But he refuses to move away from them, it's amazing to have Tyler pressed against him and Brendon trying to hold his hand. And Josh loves it, loves everything about it, loves how they're all tangled together, feeding each other cake.

It's probably one of the best nights he's had in a long time. Especially when Tyler falls asleep half-way through the movie and starts drooling on him a little bit, which he somehow manages to make cute. Tyler's always cute and even Brendon points it out when he notices him asleep. "He can't stay awake during movies ever. I swear he falls asleep every time.” He whispers, just for the sake of making sure Tyler doesn’t wake up.

Brendon falls asleep next though, right before the movie ends and Josh just smiles and cuddles closer. Yeah, they were gonna be just fine.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Jeez!!!! HONESTLY, it’s been months and I got hit with inspiration for this finally and it ended up being the longest chapter. i hope you enjoy!

**Author's Note:**

> tumblr/ junpsuits


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